Like A Switch Has Been Flicked Somewhere
by atearsarahjane
Summary: AU from Shelagh leaving the Order. What if Shelagh had joined the Nonnatuns in their vigil? What if she had stayed living at Nonnatus House
1. Chapter 1

Title comes from a quote from The X-Files:The Rain King about going from friends to more than friends. Not dissimilar to Turnadette

_Well, it seems to me that the best relationships - the ones that last - are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. **Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. **And the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with._

* * *

Putting down the phone Shelagh stood stunned, Patrick's words racing through her mind. `Chummy...haemorrhage...hospital...surgery...potentially fatal'. She had been having fish and chips with her favourite Turners, arriving soon after departing Sister Julienne and the Order when Patrick had been called out on an emergency. Timothy had simply rolled his eyes at the change of plan for the evening and informed Shelagh that she should get used to such interruptions. After a distracted scolding for cheekiness from his father as the doctor ran out of the door the boy had suggested the remaining pair play snap until Patrick returned. It was barely half an hour later that Patrick had phoned her with the grave news about Chummy. As tears began forming in her eyes Timothy rushed over.  
'Shelagh? What's going on? What did Dad say?'  
'Um..a good friend of mine is ill. I need to go, what usually happens when your father is out at night?'  
'Mrs Taylor stays over.' Timothy said referring to the housekeeper, sensing that this was not the time to argue about being left again.  
'Right. How do I contact her?'

* * *

Half an hour later, having dealt with Timothy. Shelagh rushed to the only place she could be right now-Nonnatus House. With her family. She rushed into the sitting room, her newly exposed blonde hair flying behind her.  
'I've just heard, I came as quickly as I could. Is there any news? Is Chummy okay?' She asked desperately. There was a shocked silence at the beautiful blondes arrival. Later Trixie would admit that had Shelagh not spoken she may not have recognized her friend. Seeing their shocked faces staring at her Shelagh huffed impatiently. 'Yes I know this-' She waved her hands around herself ' is different and probably rather shocking but Chummy! How is she?'  
'She haemorrhaged again a few minutes ago but they have it under control last we heard.' Sister Julienne said, the only one present not rendered speechless by the former nuns appearance I'm afraid it's all rather touch and go at the minute .'  
'Golly. Poor Chummy.' Shelagh frowned dropping into the arm of Sister Juliennes chair. There was silence for a few minutes as thoughts of Chummy and the mystery woman before them raced through their minds. Sister Evangelina was the first to break the silence.  
'I thought you were to go to Chichester?' Shelagh looked at her feet awkwardly.  
'Oh go on, indulge us. We need something to take our minds off of Chummy.' Jenny said.  
'I promise that none of us will judge you or think any less of you.' Cynthia smiled. Sister Julienne took the blondes hand and squeezed it.  
'The purpose of me going to Chichester was so that I could evaluate my future, so I could work out who God wanted me to be, what path he wished for me to walk. But that is no longer necessary. For the first time in many months I know my own mind. He wants me to be happy and I'm finally listening. He's given me an opportunity and means to happiness and I'm not going to fight it anymore. I know who I am, who I want to be and I have taken the necessary steps to becoming her. As off 4 hours ago I have officially left the Order. I'm no longer Sister Bernadette though I hope I may continue on with my nursing and midwifery duties.' She said turning to Sister Julienne to reassure herself that her former sister had not had a change of heart from earlier.  
'Of course you may my dear girl. You're still a great nurse and a highly talented midwife. It would be foolish to let you go, especially against your will. Though you are still recovering from a terrible illness and I will not hear of you returning to duty for at least a month before you can go on Rota. There's no point arguing, none of us wish for you to fall ill again.'  
'Thank you.' She nodded, sensing this was not a battle she would win, though she'd give it a jolly good attempt at a later, more appropriate time.  
'So, who are you if not Sister Bernadette?' Jenny asked.  
'If you're asking what my name it's Shelagh. Shelagh Mannion.' She smiled, slowly getting used to the sound of her name once more being spoken.  
'Shelagh. I like it.'  
'My parents will be thrilled to have your approval.' Shelagh laughed, shocking the assembled others into gaping at her. If they had thought her beautiful before she was really quite stunning whilst laughing. Her entire face lit up and there was a surprisingly mischievous glint in her eyes. 'I was named after my Seanmháthair, that's my grandmother, so you'll have pleased her and her parents too. You've won over 5 generations of the Mannion/MacDonald Clan in one move. That's some impressive work.'  
'Uh thanks.'  
'Are you going to keep living here if you're remaining a nurse? Do you have to give up your nun room?'' Cynthia asked, curious.  
'So long as you'll have me. And I don't have to give up my room but Sister Julienne suggested I may want to move into a room on the nurses corridor, closer to you lot.'  
'And are you going to?'  
'Yes. Semi new start in life so semi new living arrangements. I moved in earlier. It's the room next to Cynthia and Jane's.' There were squeals of excitement from Trixie and Jenny and reassuring smiles from Jane and Cynthia.  
'You seem to have a plan for the future. Would it be too much to ask what it is?'  
'Not so much a plan as a wish. One that, not to sound arrogant, I'm almost certain will be granted.'  
'And that would be what exactly?'  
'A family. Aside from the family I have here. I am in love.' She announced to gasps from those assembled 'and he is in love with me. If not he is certainly close to it and his son is very fond of me and I him. I was actually having dinner with the two of them when I heard the news.'  
'You left the holy order for a man?!' Sister Evangelina cried indignantly.  
'As I've already explained, this is what God wants from me and I am more than happy to oblige him. I have been miserable for months, just ask Sister Julienne and now I'm incredibly happy.'  
'Well I'm thrilled for you. So, who the lucky fella?' Trixie asked grinning.  
'Patrick Turner.'  
'As in Dr Turner?' Shelagh nodded, a shy smile presenting on her face  
'Yes. I know he's not what you were expecting. Not that you were expecting any of this but yes.' I am in love with Dr Turner  
'That explains so much! Why he was so happy to hear news from us about you, why his head has been in the clouds since you went to the Sanitorium. He's looked quite lost. I assumed he was having trouble with Timothy but I guess he was just missing you too much.' Trixie grinned.  
'From your letters and visits I've discovered I am rather missible.'  
'Very much so.' Sister Julienne said, stroking her daughter's hair in an uncharacteristically overt display of affection. Shelagh leant slightly into the nun and grasped her hand once more.  
'What's with all of the knitting?'  
'We needed something to occupy us and we thought we'd make a blanket for Chummy and baby Noakes. We're knitting squares and then sewing them together'  
'A worthy plan.'  
'Here.' Sister Evangelina handed her a pair of needles.  
'Thank you.' They returned to near silent work and knitted for hours until the phone rang once more  
'Nonnatus House, midwife speaking. Dr Turner? Uh huh. Oh thank heavens. Yes. Thank you.' Jenny put the phone down. 'She's going to be all right. It's a little boy. Chummy is still unconscious but they expect her to wake up within the next 12 hours or so.'  
'Praise the Lord.' Shelagh gasped, relieved. Sister Evangelina started crying, though she later denied ever doing so. Hugging and general crying with relief was the main order of business for the next 5 minutes before Sister Julienne sent them all of to bed. Shelagh pulled the nurses aside  
'Could I trouble you for some night clothes?'  
'Do you not own any?'  
'I'm wearing everything I own. I handed over my old nightgown with the habit.'  
'Well I'm sure we can help you out there.'


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Shelagh awoke to hushed voices outside her door. Wrapping her borrowed dressing gown around her she opened the door to find 4 eager faces staring at her.

'Good morning ladies.' She smiled

'Sorry, did we wake you up?'

'It's fine. What's going on?' She yawned as she ran her hand through her hair, she had forgotten how chaotic it could get when she wasn't wearing a head covering whilst asleep.

'We were deciding whether to wake you up or not. Chummy's allowed visitors but we weren't sure if you were up for it. Sister Julienne says if you are you'll have to wear a surgical mask to reduce you getting ill because of your reduced immune system.'

'Of course. I'll just get changed.'

'Would you like to borrow some more clothes? You had quite a long day in them yesterday. Not that I'm intimating that you small or anything.' Trixie giggled.

'If it wouldn't be a problem.'

'Not at all. I reckon we're about the same size and I'm sure I own something you'd like.'

'Thank you.'

'And we'll take you shopping after we visit Chummy. Oh this is going to be such fun.' Trixie squealed.

'That is, if you want us to.' Jane said seeing Shelagh's pensive face.

'Yes. Thank you, I'd like that.'

'Got to make you look all pretty for Dr Turner.'

'Trixie!' Jenny frowned.

'Dr Turner fell in love with me whilst I wore the habit. It doesn't get more unappealing than that. I think I'll be okay.' Shelagh smiled as the others giggled at the absurdity of the statement.

'You look so happy.' Jane said smiling.

'I am. Very much so.' Shelagh assured them beaming. Trixie screeched happily and pulled a startled Shelagh into a tight embrace that she laughingly responded to.

'Good.' The peroxide blonde pulled back. 'Now I'm sure you'll look positively wonderful in my green dress.'

* * *

'The others are just outside if you want to see them Chummy. We've all been dreadfully worried.' Jenny said softly as she squeezed her Amazonian friends hand.

'Yes please.'

'Ill just go get them.' Sister Julienne said as she left the room.

'Just a forewarning, Sister Bernadette has come back from the sanatorium, she hasn't gone to Chichester but she's left the Order. She's now called Shelagh and she doesn't wear the habit. Oh Chummy she really is quite beautiful'

'Golly. Yesterday really was eventful wasn't it.' Chummy laughed weakly. She was glad the former nun had returned, well once more. It had been a terrible shock for her to return home to discover the nun she cared so deeply for was so dreadfully unwell. It had saddened her even further to discover that, since she had departed for Africa, Sister Bernadette had become withdrawn and miserable. Chummy couldn't quite put her finger on what it was about the woman that drew her to her but she had always felt a particularly strong affinity with her.

'Yes it was rather busy.'

'Knock knock. Is it okay to come in?' Trixie asked.

'Yes, come in.'

'Hello everyone. I do hope I didn't cause too much of a fuss.' Chummy remarked awkwardly as they all filed in

'There's nobody I'd rather get in a fuss over.' Trixie grinned pulling Chummy into a gentle embrace.

'How're you feeling?'

'Sore, groggy, ecstatic. Peter and little bean have popped out for a little while. I'm sure they will return shortly and you can meet young sir yourself. Hello Shelagh. I hear you're home from the Sanatorium. I must say the surgical mask looks jolly good on you.' Chummy smiled

'Uh thanks.'

'Here they are.' Peter walked in and passed their beloved son to his mother. He was soon wrapped in hugs from all those assembled with barely a confused look to and muttered 'I'll explain later' from Shelagh.

'Ladies, meet Fred Peter Noakes. Freddie, these are your Aunts Jenny, Trixie, Shelagh, Cynthia, Jane, your Uncle Fred and Sisters Julienne, Evangelina and Monica Joan. Aunt Sister seems like quite a cumbersome title but we'll work on that. Plenty of time until you start talking little bean. So, who wants to meet their nephew first?'

* * *

'Sorry sisters, ladies, but visiting time is over and mother needs her sleep.' A nurse stuck her head around the door to address the mass.

'Gosh yes, sorry, we've rather invaded you haven't we. We'll be back soon.'

'I'm so glad you're okay.'

'Freddie's gorgeous.'

'Recover soon. We miss you already.'

'Bye girls, sisters. _YAWN_ jolly good of you all to pop by.' They began to file out after each saying goodbye to their dear friend. 'Wait, Shelagh, can I speak to you moment.'

'Of course. What is it?' Shelagh said, still holding Freddie. As the others had, she found it incredibly hard to relinquish the adorable new addition to their family.

'Are you happy now? The others told me you'd been very sad before your illness. Thank the Lord you recovered from that. Now that you're Shelagh again, are you happy?'

'Yes.' She smiled. 'I'm very happy. I was concerned Nonnatus House would turn their back on me but they've embraced this change. You'll probably hear rumours floating around about why I left so it's best you hear it from me. The primary reason I left the Order is because I have fallen in love with Dr Turner. God wants me to be with him, to care for Timothy and perhaps even raise a child of my own. And I want to. More than anything. I haven't been this happy or as certain of my purpose since I took my vows and dedicated my life to Him.' Shelagh beamed down at the chubby face in her arms and tickled his toes, Chummy smiling happily at her.

'Well I'm jolly chuffed for you.' Chummy beamed. She had always liked Dr Turner, ever since that very first breech she had had to handle wherein he had boosted her confidence and had continued to make her more and more confident in her vocation. Only yesterday, golly...had it really only been yesterday?, that he had called her one of the finest midwives at Nonnatus. She knew the praise was primarily for the benefit of Dolly Smart yet she couldn't help but swell with pride at the talk.

'Thank you. That means a lot. I should go before Matron hits me. Downside of not being a nun anymore, it's more acceptable to manhandle me. Not that that stopped Meg Carter from hitting me. You get better soon. Freddie is gorgeous, you should be proud. I'll see you soon.' Shelagh kissed Freddie's forehead before laying him back next to his mother and leaving.

'Everything okay?' Jenny asked. The nuns had left but the nurses remained to wait for Shelagh.

'Great. She just wanted to know why I left the Order and whether I was happy again. You know I reckon Freddie is going to be taller than us by the time he's 10 Cynthia with Chummy and Peter for parents.'

'Alas the perils of short stature.' Cynthia chuckled.

'Tell me about it. My old friend Jamie used to call me his toaty bucket quine which roughly means tiny pale girl.' Shelagh admitted laughing.

'Lovely. Hey-do you have a brothers or sisters? It's just occurred to me that I have no idea. Gosh there's so much we simply don't know about you.' Trixie said slipping her am through Shelagh's.

'I have a sister. Morag who is 31 .'

'And uh...how old are you?'

'I'm 31 too'

'So Morag is your twin? Identical?'

'Almost. Last time that I saw her we still looked a lot alike but I've certainly changed in the last decade, I don't know if she has too.'

'When was that? Were you allowed to keep in contact with your family whilst in the Order?' Cynthia asked.

'I haven't seen her in person since I took my vows. We're allowed minimal contact. I get Christmas cards and notes from her and I reply. We usually write around the anniversary of my mother's death as well.'

'When was that?'

'26 years ago. I don't really remember her to be honest.'

'So young! How terrible. What about your father?'

'Died when we were 16. Our uncle Andrew looked after us after that.'

'Aww. Any nephews or nieces? Is Morag married?'

'Is this really necessary information?' Shelagh laughed.

'Yes. We've been deprived for far too long.'

'She was still single last I heard. I really must tell her about this. I should visit her!' Shelagh lit up at the thought. Until her move to London she and Morag had been almost inseparable, the two of them sticking together in the face off all the hardships life had thrown at them.

'Oh that'll be lovely for you.' Cynthia smiled 'Sister Julienne and Dr Turner won't be letting you travel that far for quite a while. You only left the Sanatorium yesterday.'

'I know and I think I'm going to be cooped up for far longer than I want. But it's for my own good and done with the best intentions so I'll get through it.' She smiled in defeat.

'You should have heard the lecture Sisters Julienne and Evangelina gave us about not tiring you out whilst shopping.'

'We'll try not to let Trixie get too overeager.' Jane smiled, though her mouth parted in shock at her tenacity. There was a shocked silence as the others also gaped at her before Trixie broke in crossly-

'I may get excited about shopping and clothes but I'm not about to make a very dear friend ill over it.' She cried indignantly before smiling at Shelagh who had flushed at the description.

'Let's go shopping ladies. Wait, do even have any money Shelagh?'

'Yes, I handed over some money when I entered the Order which was returned to me. I have about £100.' Shelagh admitted.

'Wow. Not bad.'

* * *

'Are you sure about this? It's not too tight or revealing?' Shelagh frowned brushing a hand across the material swathed around her midriff.

'You're still more covered up than Trixie and Jenny. And you have such beautiful legs. If you don't feel comfortable though you don't have to wear it.'

'No, it's okay. This all feels weird but I'm going to have to get used to the fact that I no longer wear the habit. I have to start doing things that make me uncomfortable else I'd never get anything done. I want to move on with my life. I trust you not to get me into trouble Cynthia.'

'But not us?' Trixie pouted dramatically.

'Of course. It's just, I know your taste and mischievous side. If I depended solely on you I may end up in the shortest dress possible.' She teased grinning at the blonde. 'On a related note, now that I'm not a nun I can tell you, everyone knows about you girls drinking in your rooms.' She smirked, eyes glinting with mirth.

'Oh! But we were so careful!'

'No you weren't. I heard you yell 'hide the gin' several times after I'd knocked on your doors, once or twice you even left the door open. One time I was watching you and you didn't even realise, you shut the door in my face.'

'Whoops. I'm terribly sorry about the door in the face Shelagh. We always wanted to invite you to join in, and I always got the feeling you wanted to but, well, you were a nun.'

'No need to worry about the door. It was Cynthia not you.' Shelagh grinned. 'But you're right.' she sighed 'Sometimes I'd just stare at the group of you and think 'what if?' Occasionally I'd even go to my room and let my hair down and take my glasses off. Remind myself that I'm still human, not just a habit.'

'It must be hard being a young nun. Sisters Evangelina and Julienne are used to it and, no offence to them, they don't look their best anymore. But you're gorgeous and young and remember much clearer a life aside from the order and you're gorgeous.'

'You said that twice.' Shelagh blushed.

'I'm still in shock over just how beautiful you are. Please always wear your hair down.'

'That would be wholly impractical.'

'Okay outside of the delivery room and clinic always wear your hair down.'

'I'll see what I can do.'

' So what does our esteemed doctor think of your hair?'

'Trixie!'

'He's rather fond of it I think. He was speechless for a minute when I let it down, I'm not sure if he was having difficulty trying to come up with a compliment. Heavens what if he was? What if he hates my hair? Sorry Trix but I may have to wear it up from now on.' Shelagh said panicked.

'In positive he loves it down. He has to. I'm sure he was just speechless because you looked so lovely.' Cynthia reassured the distraught looking blonde.

'I hope so. I know vanity is a sin and all but...'

'Its natural to want to look good for the man you love. There's absolutely no reason to feel guilty.'

'Indeed. He led you and Dr Turner to each other, I'm sure He'll allow you to help Him.' Cynthia smiled reassuringly. 'And you look beautiful either way.'

'Thank you.'

'We should celebrate. Chummy is okay, Freddie's alive and well and Shelagh is happy, healthy and, well, she's Shelagh.'

'Lets go out. Introduce Shelagh to the fun she's been missing out on.' Trixie squealed

I'd love to, honestly I would but I'll be knackered by 8pm. I think Sister Julienne would tie me to my bed if I even tried.'

'I imagine that's be pretty amusing to watch. You're right of course.'

'Let's go for high tea and celebrate instead.' Jane suggested

'Marvellous idea.' Jenny grinned

'Ooh yes. I've been dying to visit that little tea shop Gillian Thomas was telling me about.' Trixie squealed.

'If that's what you want Shelagh.'

'That sounds nice.'


	3. Chapter 3

'Shelagh may I speak to you.' Sister Julienne said softly, appearing behind the woman in question.

'Of course sister.' They walked into the nuns office. 'Is there something wrong?' Shelagh asked frowning as she perched nervously on the edge of her seat. She could not help but be reminded of the many times they had sat like this. The time before last Sister Julienne had asked her to '_Change nothing. Go nowhere. Stay exactly as you are. I really don't think I can do without you'. _So much had changed since then, she had changed so much and she had left them all. She had failed to fulfil what she had promised to do.

'Not at all. I just wanted to know how your day was. Your first full day in the real world as it were. The girls weren't too boisterous? They didn't wear you out?' Sister Julienne frowned, well aware of how excitable Trixie and Jenny, particularly the former, could be. She was also aware however of how loved Shelagh was in Nonnatus House as evidenced by the heartbreak that had followed Sister Bernadette's diagnosis and retreat to the sanatorium. She suspected that, along with the calming affect of Cynthia and Jenny, would have helped keep the excitement in check

'It was...nice. They helped me choose some new clothes and we went to a tea house to celebrate Chummy and Freddie being okay and me returning healthy. Oh I missed them so terribly whilst I was at the Sanatorium. I missed all of you so much and I thank God I'm here with you all again. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder and it absolutely does. I love every single person who lives here. You are all my family.'

'As we consider you my dear. I am so glad you are okay. I do not know what I would've done without you.'

'You seem to have managed admirably, though I do wish you'd allow me to return to work sooner. I hate the thought of lying around when we're already short staffed.' Shelagh said uncomfortably. She felt terribly for leaving them in the lurch when she left and now with Chummy off her feet too...

'Managing maybe but not happily and you know the answer regarding work.' Sister Julienne said levelling Shelagh with a stern look before softening and walking around her desk to take Shelagh's hands in hers. 'But I didn't mean I don't what I'd do without my nurse and midwife. I meant I don't know what I'd do without the daughter I love so dearly, the daughter I never thought I'd have but who found her way into my heart anyway, the daughter I no longer have to consider as a sister and pretend to love no more than any other. I love you Shelagh' Sister Julienne admitted, tears beginning to trickle down her face.

'I love you too Mother.' Shelagh said flinging herself into Sister Julienne's arms. A decade of repressed affection bursting forth between the two women. 'You are the only mother I know or want.' She sobbed.

'Thank you.' The cried into each other's shoulders, clinging on to the others backs as if their very existence depended upon it and in that moment it did. For when they withdrew they would no longer be Sister Bernadette and her sister in charge or Shelagh and her boss. From this moment on they would be mother and daughter, unafraid to love each other openly and deeply.

'Do you ever wonder if the others know of our relationship.' Shelagh asked as they sat side by side on the edge of Sister Julienne's desk, Shelagh leaning into Sister Julienne's one armed embrace.

'They would have to be blind not to notice that we are fond of each other. As a sister I could not allow myself to favour you over anyone else. Now I can and not feel guilty. If they do not know how we feel they soon will my darling girl.' Sister Julienne smiled as she kissed the top of her daughter's head

'Indeed. The girls suggested we go out to celebrate me being Shelagh and Chummy being okay. I told them you'd probably tie me to the bed if I agreed.' Shelagh giggled as her mother chuckled.

'You're right I would. And set up camp in your room to make sure you did not escape.' She threatened jokingly.

'I think I'll have an early night tonight. Go to bed in a few hours.'

'Sounds wise.'

'It's bizarre. I spent so many years waking up at dawn and going to bed sometimes not until the next morning and yet now I wake later and am still wiped out by early evening. I woke up at 9am today. 9am! I can't remember the last time I woke up that late-even in the Sanatorium I woke early for Lauds. But no more. Gosh this is going to be a lot to get used to.'

'I remember a very grumpy young woman who hated getting up for Lauds. And once kicked Sister Evangelina when she tried to wake her up.'

'Heavens I had forgotten that.' Shelagh giggled at the memory. 'She was absolutely livid, she didn't speak to me for days.'

'And Sister Marie-Claire had to lock you two in a room to clear the air.' Sister Julienne chuckled.

'You smuggled me in an almond sponge.'

'Well I always was fond of you.'

'I was only a postulant then. I had real guts to stand up to Sister Evangelina then. Now I'm used to her brashness but I was terrified of her when I first came here.' Shelagh admitted.

'I remember. You had forgotten to wear your wimple once and she shouted at you.'

'Ah yes. The night I curled up with you in bed sobbing for several hours. Who'd have guessed I would come to love her so much.'

'I did. Because you are such a kind, such a loving person.' Sister Julienne dropped another kiss into her daughters hair as she snuggled further into her side. KNOCK KNOCK 'Come in. Ah Cynthia, what can I do for you?' She asked as a smile broke across Cynthia's face at the sight of Shelagh and the nun so closely intertwined on the desk. The young nurse had often observed a particularly strong, but unspoken, connection between the nuns.

'Sorry sister. Dr Turner is on the phone for you Shelagh.' She grinned as Shelagh's face lit up.

'Thanks Cynthia. I'll be back Mother, I'm not done talking just yet.'

'Go speak to your young man my dear, can't leave him waiting.'

'No. Of course.' Shelagh practically skipped out the door

'Isn't in wonderful Sister. She's so happy again.'

'Indeed it is Cynthia. Indeed it is.


	4. Chapter 4

**Shoutout to Little Polveir and MyLittleYellowBird on her for reviews and everyone on tumblr for their support of this. You are all too wonderful :)**

**Reviews are much appreciated so I can tell how this is going xx**

* * *

'Hello Patrick.' Shelagh smiled as she picked up the phone.

'Hello Shelagh.' She could hear the smile in his voice at the sound of her voice.  
'The nurses are almost certainly spying on me right now, just a warning.' Shelagh laughed.  
'Oh are they indeed. Nosy beggars.' He chuckled.  
'It's all in good fun really. I've been known to be dragged into it in the past on one or two occasions.'  
'Shocking behaviour Miss Mannion. I might have to reconsider my decision to court you, I have reputation to uphold. I can't be seen with such a woman.'  
'Your loss then.' She giggled.  
'I love your laugh.' He admitted. 'I prefer to see it, to see your eyes light up and your nose crinkle in that adorable way it does. Listening is almost as sweet.'  
'Patrick you praise me too highly.' She blushed.  
'I am positive that is impossible for you are the most beautiful, intelligent, funny, caring, amazing, incredible, wonderful woman I have ever met. And I barely even know you.' He said earnestly as Shelagh blushed deeper.  
'Thank you.' There was a comfortable silence as she digested the praise.  
'In sorry for leaving you last night and for taking you from Timothy.'  
'It's fine Patrick. You were needed. I speak on behalf of everyone here when I thank you for saving Chummy. We will always be grateful to you. Have you seen her yet?'  
'Oh I didn't do anything. They only wanted me there in case they needed someone with a detailed set of interactions with Chummy. But yes I've seen her briefly. She said you and the others stopped by. She congratulated me on making you so happy. Thanked me for it actually.'  
'Well you do. Ever so much.' She grinned.  
'And you I. I cannot wait to spend more time with you. How was the rest of the day? I hope you didn't over exert yourself.'  
'I'm perfectly fine Doctor. Though I get the distinct feeling I'm going to be mollycoddled for the next few months.' She rolled her eyes unseen by it's recipient.  
'You can bet on it.'  
'Yippee. As for what I did, the nurses took me shopping for clothes as I have only what I was in yesterday and would be hopeless on my own. Then we went out for, and I quote, 'posh tea' to celebrate Chummy and I being well.'  
'I'm sure you look excellent in them. I cannot wait to see you wearing them. I cannot wait to see you again full stop. They're okay with this all then?'  
'Yes. They're happy for us. Happy that I'm healthy and happy. It seemed to come as a shock to them understandably but they seemed to be okay with it. I shouldn't have worried so.'  
'I'm glad. Do you have any plans for tomorrow?'  
'I don't think so.'  
'Let me take you out for dinner. Last night was wonderful but I'd like to have you to myself. Timothy is staying over at Jack's house. I can give you my undivided attention. Just as you deserve.'  
'I'd like that. Very much.'  
'Do you a preference?'  
'I don't exactly have a lot of experience in that area Patrick.' She laughed.  
'Of course, sorry. I have just the place in mind. I think you'll like it.'  
'I'm sure I will. Where is it?'

'Surprise.'

'Patrick!But how will I know what to wear?'

'Wear something smart looking. It's better than a tea shop but not quite The Ritz. Though you'll be the most beautiful woman there anyway.'  
'I-'  
'No. I know you're not used to compliments so I'm going to get you used to them as quickly as I can so you can accept how amazing you really are. Oh, Timothy's calling me, I've got to go.'  
'Okay. Tell him I say hi.'  
'Will do.'  
'Patrick'  
'Yes?'  
'I couldn't be more certain.'  
'I am completely certain. I'll phone you with a time tomorrow. I'll leave you to your spies now. Bye.'  
'Bye.' Putting down the phone she grinned and lent against the desk, waiting for the inevitable attack from the spies. Although she had only been caught and roped in on one occasion she had witnessed them spying on phone call many times throughout the decade since her postulancy had begun and was familiar with the procedure though not usually from this end of the deal. 'You can come out ,I know you're there ladies.' Sheepishly they came around the corner but it was clear that all of them were thrilled by what they'd heard. 'Don't worry; I'm not angry with you. I expected it to be honest. It's nice in a strange, twisted way. I'm really one of the nurses now.'

'You make us sound like a gang.' Cynthia chuckled.

'No comment.'

'You two are so cute and I haven't even seen you together yet. Well, actually I have, many times. How did we not spot this going on?' Trixie wondered aloud.  
'We both fought our feelings, myself very hard and I believe he did too.'  
'Then how did you ever realise he loved you?'  
'I don't really think this is an appropriate place for such talk.' Shelagh said nervously, unsure of who was listening. As happy as she was to be honest with the nurses and her mother, she was concerned that sister Evangelina was not taking this as well appeared. The nun did not need to overhear the reasons her sister had left.  
'Come on then.' Trixie pulled Shelagh away from the desk, up the stairs and into her room with the others fleeing amused. 'Spill.'  
'Okay! I'm still on an emotional high so I'll tell you. It was a number of little things at first, an extra kindness, a uncharacteristically kind word or compliment, a shared cigarette.' She said laughing at the memory. 'At first I just thought it was me reading too much into everything, a wishful thinking of sorts, perhaps even just a reaction to me getting kinder. The first time I had a strong suspicion was a few days before the summer fair, we were taking in the kitchen of the parish hall about what could be improved there with the money we expected to raise at the fete. We were discussing spirit lamps when I looked up and he looked up. Try as I might I couldn't take my eyes off of his. After a few seconds Timothy ran in and that was it. Even then I thought he might have been looking off into space or thinking deep. Then came the fair. You remember how Patrick was called away to Mrs Harding and I ran the 3 legged race with Timothy?'  
'Yes, you fell over the finishing line and won.'  
'Indeed. I cut my hand and so went to wash it after I'd untied Timothy and Patrick had picked up and returned my glasses. Whilst I was washing it Patrick came in and offered to take a look at my hand. I agreed, even though there was no actual medical need, it was only a minor injury. He took my hand and began to look over it and then started to stroke it with his thumb, and then didn't let go. I still don't know if this happened as slowly as it seemed but I definitely had time to see what was going on and remove my hand. He closed his eyes and brought my hand up to his lips and kissed the palm of my hand, kissed the wound. After what seemed like forever but had potentially only been a second I pulled my hand away and turned my back on him explaining that I had to because of the promise I had made to God. He said he understood and walked out. That was when I knew I wasn't alone in my torment. There was definitely something been us. I couldn't ignore it anymore. Then I was diagnosed with TB and we both realised that life was too short not to at least consider it. He wrote to me in the Sanatorium but I didn't read any of the letters. I was still riddled with guilt and confusion but I could now admit to myself that I wanted to be with him, wanted to be a mother to Timothy, wanted a family and that God was giving me a chance. I spoke to Sister Julienne and about a week before I was discharged I read all of his letters in one go. Oh and they were perfect, exactly want I wanted and needed to read. It was then that I read the words I'd been fighting against. He was in love with me and hoped I loved him too. And that is how I came to realise he loved me.'  
'Aww. You're a real life love story.'  
'You said all of his letters, how many did he write? If that's not too intrusive a question?'  
'I've just told you the most secret and intimate events of my recent life. I think that question will be fine. Just don't expect me to always be this open. I'm still riding on excitement and happiness right now.' She reminded them.  
'Okay.'  
'So? How many letters?' Shelagh smiled and walked over to her bedside cabinet and pulled out a stack of nearly 20 letters and clutched them to her. The nurses jaws dropped.  
'Wow. That's...a lot of letters.' Jenny said.  
'He must really love you.' Jane smiled.  
'He does. And I couldn't be happier.' She flopped back onto Trixie's bed grinning. The others laughed at the uncharacteristically happy former nun who was quite obviously giddy in love.  
'I must admit, I never expected to see this.' Cynthia said gesturing to Shelagh who giggled slightly.  
'Neither did I.' Shelagh admitted.  
'I'm so happy for you.' Trixie said laying next to Shelagh and hugging her. 'You don't know how many times I've wanted to do this.'  
'Cuddle with me on your bed?' Shelagh asked, eyebrow cocked in amusement.  
'No silly. Hug you.'  
'If you wanted to hug me you should have just hugged me. I'd have hugged you back. I'm not that impersonal am I?'  
'You were very...proper. The perfect nun who hid behind the rules.'  
'Well I did a bang up job of keeping to that.' She giggled  
'Dinner!' Sister Evangelina called out.  
'Good. I'm ravenous.' Jenny said.  
'We had cake not 3 hours ago!' Shelagh exclaimed.  
'Jenny's always hungry. We're not just learning about you here. There's a lot you need to learn about us that we keep hidden from the nuns. It'll all come with many late night chats.' Trixie beamed.  
'I still have a lot of learning about myself before you can.' Shelagh frowned 'I've been living such a different life for so long I've almost forgotten who Shelagh is. I had to really else Sister Bernadette would have have a much harder time of it.'  
'We'll help you remember.' Jane said smiling as they got up and walked down to the dining room.  
'Thank you.'


	5. Chapter 5

'I'm back.' Shelagh grinned as she entered Sister Julienne's office once more. The nun had retired to her office immediately after dinner had finished. With the temporary incapacitation of Shelagh and the potential departure of Nurse Noakes to be a full time mother the midwives were in dire need of a replacement nun to work beside them. She had buried herself in paperwork as soon as Shelagh had departed to speak on the phone with Dr Turner. She still couldn't quite bring herself to believe what had happened. Sister Bernadette had left the order, become Shelagh and was now being courted by the local GP that Sister Julienne had known and worked beside for nearly 25 years. She truly could not think of a better man for her daughter to fall in love with having seen what a wonderful husband he had been to Timothy's mother. This fact did not stop her from stopping and marvelling at the situation at sporadic points of her work. She had subtly observed the young woman through dinner and it had warmed her heart to see how happily she had interacted with her fellow nurses. Now, after being set to washing up, Shelagh had returned to her.

'Hello my dear.' Sister Julienne smiled as Shelagh perched on the edge of her desk. 'What was going on with the nurses earlier? Nurse Franklin seemed to be pulling you rather hard. You were out of sight before I could scold her.'

'No need, I was fine. They just had some understandable questions about Patrick and me and then were getting excited because I'm apparently sickeningly in love.' She admitted blushing 'and then Trixie cuddled me on my bed for a few minutes.'

'Cuddled? Like a teddy bear?' Sister Julienne laughed. Shelagh nodded, grinning.

'Apparently she's wanted to hug me for years. Especially during my time at the Sanatorium so we had a long cuddle to make up for it. They said they never felt that they could hug me. That I was very proper, that I hid behind the rules and my views. Did, did I ever come across as that to you? Like I was cold and unapproachable?'

'Cold? Certainly not. You're one of the warmest people I've met. But I do understand what they mean by you being proper. You always tried to stick to the rules and not get too intimate with the nurses. If I may make an observation?' Shelagh nodded. 'It seems to me that you wished to be like them, could see what you had given up for your holy views and feared if you got to close to them then you'd get hurt or see too much and want more and then you'd feel guilty and retreat further from them but inevitably find yourself drawn to them, which is understandable. You're a beautiful, vibrant, funny young woman who'd fit into their group perfectly. You already have been for a few years.' Seeing Shelagh's shocked face Sister Julienne smiled ruefully 'I've been watching you for a while my dear. When it was just you and the nurses and you thought nobody else was looking you would be much more relaxed. Like when you got your new glasses and Chummy tried them on.'

'You're so right. I never even realised I was doing that. Though I did know I envied them. Do you remember when they all went to the dance for Chummy and Peter's second date?'

'Of course. Nurse Franklin didn't stop talking about it for a week.'

'That was the first time I truly doubted my decision to take holy orders. They all looked so pretty. As soon as they left I went to my room and took my wimple off and let my hair down, took my glasses off. Imagined what it would be like to pretty myself up and go out and have fun with them. I hadn't looked that closely at myself in years. I couldn't help but notice that I wasn't bad looking, quite pretty compared to when I was wimpled. I felt so guilty for the rest of the week.' Shelagh admitted tentatively. This may be her mother she was talking to but it was also her former superior and such thoughts were forbidden at the time.

'You're stunning. It always worried me when you were new that you'd catch some poor sailors eye and you'd run off with him and I'd lose you.'

'10 years out, wrong profession and I could never truly leave you but you got the general gist of it.' Shelagh laughed.

'Indeed. I truly am so very happy for you my dear girl. I couldn't let you go to anyone else.'

'Slow down. We haven't even been on a date yet. On that note, Patrick is taking me to dinner tomorrow.' She informed sister Julienne, unable to hide her excitement. 'But I'm not going anywhere just yet.'

'But you want to? You want to marry him?'

'More than anything. I'm happy as I am right now though. I'd like to get to know Shelagh Mannion again before I become Shelagh Turner. Gosh. That sounds rather good doesn't it?' Shelagh gaped as the weight of her future hit her.

'It does indeed. By the way, I phoned the mother house to let them know you wouldn't be going to them. They say they hope you'll be happy in your new life.'

'But what about Poplar? The community? What if they don't take this too well? What if they think there was something going on while I was still a nun? I'd hate to be the cause of any aspersions being cast on Nonnatus and the Order.'

'That is not beyond imagination however I do not wish for you to trouble yourself. If that occurs then we will deal with it. They only people that matter know the truth. Your family and friends will defend you if necessary.'

'And I thank them for it. I just wish they didn't have to.'

'Gossips will be gossips. They've been around for millennia and they'll go on for many more. They'll get over it soon; just you wait until the next scandal comes along.'

'You're right, of course. You always are. Have I ever mentioned how annoying that is?'

'Careful now. I may be your mother but I'm also your boss, if you want to return to work in a few months you'd better stay on my good side.'

'Aye aye captain.' Shelagh gave her a 2 finger salute. Sister Julienne chuckled.

'I had forgotten cheeky you were.'

'But I'm endearingly cheeky and therefore staying on your good side. I must say it's a relief to not have to bite my tongue at every other thought that passes through my mind though. I don't think I'll ever be able to fully go back to the free speaker I was but it's nice not having to censor myself so much.'

'We'll see.' Shelagh yawned 'why don't you go up to bed my dear. You've had two busy days in a row and a late night yesterday.'

'I might just do that. Or at least go up to bed and read for a bit. I'm slightly knackered.' She admitted stifling another yawn. 'Goodnight...mum.'

'Goodnight daughter.' They grinned before embracing tightly.


	6. Chapter 6

'Shelagh wake up!' Trixie shook her roughly.

'Wha-? Trixie? I'm recovering from being ill! If there isn't a fire then I'm going back to sleep right now!' Shelagh groaned into her pillow. She had been thoroughly enjoying her dream, one that had caused her such torment whilst in the Sanatorium. Even as she turned over in the bed the image of herself sat on the sofa she shared with her husband, a male Turner curled up on either side of her and their new born daughter mewling in her arms, drifted painfully away from her. Now that she could allow herself to dare to dream about such events she never wanted to stop.

'Sorry, no fire. Just thought you'd want to know that Dr Turner is on the phone for you again. Something about the specifics of your date this evening. But if you're not interested...' She laughed as Shelagh's eyes flew open. 'For a former nun you're very difficult to wake up!'

'I'm up.' Shelagh groaned as a contended smile began to creep across her face.. 'You know I never quite got used to rising before dawn. Remind me to tell you one day about the time Sister Evangelina tried to wake me up and we ended up being locked in a cupboard for 6 hours as a result. Besides it's too early to tease me. What time is it?'

'7.30.'

'I'll kill him.' Still in her nightclothes Shelagh sleepily made her way down to the phone 'good... good morning Patrick.' She yawned into the receiver.

'Morning sleepy head. I hope you slept well, got to have you nice and rested for our date later.'

'I slept very well thank you and was continuing to enjoy it when Trixie jumped on my bed until I woke up to tell me you were on the phone.' She blushed, recalling just how well she had slept and why.

'I did no such thing!' They heard the blonde call from just around the corner. Briefly Shelagh wondered whether she would ever be able to have a private phone call in Nonnatus.

'Sorry my love. I'm going to be busy for the rest of the day if I want this evening off so I thought I'd phone you before I started. I've booked a table for us for 7pm. Does that sound okay?'

'That sounds wonderful. Am I allowed to know where are we going yet?'

'That would ruin the surprise.'

'Patrick! Tell me, I don't like surprises.' She pouted, somewhat childishly she admitted to herself.

'Are you whining?' He chuckled 'Don't worry you'll like this one. '

'Promise?'

'I promise. Ah, first patient has arrived. Until later my officer.'

'Bye sergeant. I can't wait.' She put the phone down.

'So? Where's he taking you?' Trixie grinned

'He won't tell me. Apparently it's a surprise.'

'Oh but how on earth are we supposed to make you look suitably gorgeous if we don't know what you need to be suitable for?!' Trixie cried aghast.

'I asked him yesterday and he said smart.'

'Well then you can't go wrong with that black dress you bought yesterday. You looked ever so magnificent in the shop and we can do your hair and make-up. Oh and you can borrow my high heels. Oh this is so exciting.'

'Calm down Trixie. I would appreciate your help with making me 'suitably gorgeous' but I think it best I don't borrow your heels until I have a bit more practice with regular heels. I don't really want to fall down the front steps. That would not be a good start to the date.'

'Very Chummy-esque.'

'Quite.' They laughed. 'Aren't you supposed to be eating breakfast and getting ready to begin your rounds? With Chummy and I off of work I don't think Sister Evangelina would be best pleased if you were late.'

'Oh don't be such a bore. Agh! 'Trixie yelped as Shelagh began pushing her out the door. 'You are freakishly strong Shelagh Mannion.' She laughed as she fought against the Scot.

'What on earth?' Sister Evangelina gaped as a cackling, nightie clad and somewhat dishevelled Shelagh pushed a giggling and protesting Trixie into the room. The pair stopped suddenly as they noticed the breakfast table full of stunned Nonnatuns. Trixie bit her lip to stem the rising giggle. Shelagh looked down at her feet, half embarrassed to be caught in her nightwear and having such a overtly happy time in front of her former Sisters and half stifling a answering giggle.

'Sit down and eat both of you.' Sister Julienne smiled at the pair.

'I'll just go and get changed.' Shelagh said fingering the hem of her nightgown awkwardly as the embarrassment won out over the mirth. There was far more skin on show than she was sure Sister Evangelina would approve of. As beautiful as she felt in it and as much as the nurses loved it Shelagh couldn't help feeling it wasn't quite...appropriate for dining with her former sisters.

'Sit!'

'Okay.'

'What just happened?' Jenny laughed staring slack jawed between the new arrivals who were studiously avoiding catching each other's eye.

'Trixie was refusing to stop pestering me and actually go to work.' Shelagh laughed.

'Pestering?! I was helping you!' Trixie cried indignantly as Shelagh sniggered.

'Alright but you called me boring for pointing out you should be getting to breakfast so you can be ready to go to work. So I pushed you to work.'

'Our favourite Scot here is surprisingly strong. I shudder to think how strong you'll be when you're back to normal strength.' She poked her tongue out at the still sniggering Shelagh.

'What are your plans for today then?' Cynthia asked, eager to distract Sister Evangelina from the comment she seemed about to make.

'I'm going to write to Morag, well, write to her last known location at least. She moves quite often so it often is a bit of a paper trail. She forgets to inform me when she does it. I love her dearly but she's a bit scatter-brained.'

'Oh that'll be lovely. Do you think she'll visit?'

'She'll have to. I get the impression in not going to be allowed further than the end of the road without a panic taking place.'

'Well I should hope you're going further than the end of the road tonight. Although I suppose being exclusively in your doctor's company means less of a panic should occur.'

'Did he not say where you'd be going?' Sister Julienne asked.

'No.'

'It's a surprise.' Trixie grinned 'it's terribly romantic.'

'A few minutes ago you were horrified by the idea.' Shelagh remarked.

'Until you mentioned he had given at best minimal information so we can dress you to the nines.'

'Not quite that far Trixie.' She smiled tightly. Seeing her daughter's discomfort Sister Julienne grasped Shelagh's hand under the table.

'I spoke to Peter earlier. Chummy is to be discharged tomorrow.' She beamed.

'Wonderful.' Shelagh grinned as everyone shared similar sentiments.

'Oh thank goodness. I quite mean to give young Freddie a good talking to about worrying us so much.' Sister Evangelina huffed.

'Freddie Noakes. Sounds rather marvellous doesn't it. Bit old fashioned though. Big Fred will have a great day, do you remember how put out he was when we shot down Fred as a name for Raymond?' Trixie laughed.

'Apparently he _is_ named for big Fred. Apparently they had a quite a talk before she went into labour.'

'Who's Raymond?' Jane asked.

'Oh now that's a story.' Sister Julienne smiled launching into the tale.

* * *

'Shelagh are you okay? You seemed a bit uncomfortable during breakfast.' Jenny asked as they retired to the kitchen having been tasked with doing the washing up as everyone else rushed out of the door to prepare for work.

'I'm fine. It's just-it's one thing to talk to you lot about dressing up and going out on a date with Patrick and wearing somewhat revealing nighties around you. It's fine with Sister Julienne. It's just, Sister Evangelina and Sister Monica Joan. It's only been 2 days since this all happened and I'm not quite comfortable. It's going to take a while for us to acclimatise to this.'

'Sorry, we didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. You know what I'm like, if I say anything else you don't like just tell me. Or kick me. It's what the others do when I don't and I quote 'shut my big gob.' You used to just hiss my name but now that kicking is on the table you may wish to reconsider.' Trixie said slipping into the kitchen and hugging the Scot.

'I will take on board what you said and think upon it thank you Trixie. Now you definitely should be going off to work this time.'

'I'm going. No need to manhandle me again.'

'Good.' Shelagh giggled.


	7. Chapter 7

'So. Are you excited? Nervous? First date with the man you love. It's a big thing.' Trixie pointed out a she finished applying the minimal make-up they had agreed upon for Shelagh's big date. All of the nurses had congregated in Trixie's room in a joint effort to make Shelagh presentable. Secretly Shelagh was very grateful for the presence of Cynthia and Jane who were balancing out Trixie and Jenny's more elaborate plans. Unfamiliar with the practices of make up and hair styling, having sported a simple ponytail if her hair was up ever since Trixie's admonishment for the out of date and out of style hairstyle she had attempted to wear to the hospital, she had turned her self completely into their hands.

'I am excited yes but not overly nervous. We have known each other for 10 years after all. We're not complete strangers.'

'You've both known Sister Bernadette and Dr Turner not Shelagh and Patrick though.' Cynthia pointed out

'I know. There's something really rather lovely about that. I know him so little and he I, but not for much longer. He's going to discover Shelagh at the same time I do. At the same time you do too.'

'I know one thing he's definitely going to discover tonight. You Miss Mannion are stunning.' Jenny smiled as Shelagh blushed deeply, still greatly flustered by such compliments. She imagined it would take a long time for her to get used to them.

'Is it vain of me to want to look nice Patrick?' She asked still worrying about the issue.

'I'm not exactly the authority on that subject but I don't think so. Anyways, you're not a nun anymore. You can be as vain as you like.'

'It's not just something I can switch on and off you know. It was a part of my mind-set for over a decade. Mentally some parts of me will take a long time to stop being a nun. I'm not sure if I ever will fully transfer. I don't want to fully change, I loved being Sister Bernadette and I learnt a lot.' She sighed.

'True. Sorry. Well you definitely look pretty enough for him. And we loved Sister Bernadette too.'

'Thank you. All of you. Truly thank you, I would have been completely lost without you.' She beamed gratefully at the ladies, taking Jane's hand in hers and squeezing it.

'You'd have managed.'

'Barely.' There was a knock at the door. 'Come in. Sister Julienne!'

'Dr Turner is at the door for you.' She smiled as the nurses began to buzz with excitement. 'Will you leave us for a moment please nurses?' They nodded and scampered downstairs, eager to get a good viewpoint of the new couples reunion.

'Well? Will I do do you think?' Shelagh asked nervously wrapping her arms around her waist.

'You look lovely my dear girl.' The nun said stroking the blonde's carefully styled hair tenderly.

'Thank you Mother.' Shelagh hugged her nervously.

'Don't be so anxious. You love him and he loves you. And you are very beautiful. Now come on, it's time to take your next step into the real world.' Together they made their way down into the living room where Patrick sat silently; clutching a bunch of flowers as if his very life depended upon it. Squeezing her hand one last time Sister Julienne retired to the kitchen and was not surprised to find all other occupants of Nonnatus House also there, not so subtly spying upon the pair. Biting her lip to swallow a hearty chuckle she joined them. Shelagh cleared her throat and Patrick jumped off of the sofa and span to face her. A grin instantly materialised upon her face as he saw her for the first time since he'd been called away from her two nights before. He was speechless, his jaw brushing the floor. He stood there simply staring for a moment.

'Patrick-breathe.'

'Shelagh!' He shook himself from his trance with a grin.

'Hello Patrick.' She smiled. Goodness he was looking exceptionally handsome tonight, she noted. He was wearing the 3 piece suit that she had accidentally admitted was her favourite during one of their many conversations that very first day of theirs. She could not tell if the wearing of it tonight was her benefit or an unnecessary attempt from Patrick to persuade her he did in fact own semi decent attire and was an attractive prospective suitor. The latter was unnecessary-she had seen him at 4am, covered in dirt and blood that was not his, exhausted from hours of labour following long shifts and rounds. She had found him gorgeous even then, though she had tried very hard not to admit that fact to herself. Either way the gesture touched her deeply.

'You look beautiful, incredible, amazing. Wow. Uh-these are for you.' He thrust the flowers towards her. She reached out and took the proffered flowers from his strong hands. Raising them to her face she couldn't help the returning grin that echoed his as she inhaled. Having been raised in and around flowers due to her friends parents florist business that she had worked at for occasionally she instantly recognised the blooms and the meaning behind them. Hyacinths for sincerity, gardenia's for joy, bronze chrysanthemum for excitement, orchids for delicate beauty, red roses for love and aster for contentment. This knowledge thrilled her. She secretly hoped that Patrick had picked the flowers for those meanings though she suspected he would not have had the time to pick them out personally.

'Thank you. They're beautiful.'

'Beautiful flowers for the most beautiful woman I have seen.' She blushed.

'Thank you. Where are we going? Let me just put these in a vase ' She asked as she turned to see a vase being held out to her through from around the kitchen door frame. 'Thanks ladies.' She laughed, taking it and arranging the flowers in it.

'That is still a surprise.'

'I don't even get one measly clue?' She pouted playfully.

'Okay here's a clue-it is a place where you eat.'

'Well it's obvious now.' She rolled her eyes. 'I don't know why I didn't guess that before.'

'Drat, I knew that was too specific a hint.' He groaned as she laughed. 'We should go, don't want to be late.'

'Can't tarnish your spotless attendance record.' She giggled.

'Indeed.'

'I'll have her back by 11pm.' He called to the barely concealed Nonnatuns as he held put his hand to her. Grinning she took it and, in a moment of happiness fuelled levity, she called back-

'I hope you all enjoyed the show,' before bowing and walking out with him.

'She's so happy.' Cynthia sighed smiling as they moved out of the kitchen into the living room to observe Patrick helping Shelagh into his car not before he placed a kiss to the back of her hand.

'They both are. This is truly God's will.'

'I will admit there is a certain...charm to the two of them together.' Sister Evangelina conceded.

'High praise indeed.' Trixie giggled as they watched the pair drive out.

* * *

**Main bulk of the date will be in the next two chapters but I'm going away for the weekend tomorrow so it may not be up until after then.**


	8. Chapter 8

The First Date part 1/2

* * *

'So, hello Shelagh.' Patrick smiled as he broke the comfortable 10 minute silence they'd been indulging in, sat side by side in his car with their hands entwined. Every now or then Patrick had to liberate his hand to change gear but it would return to hers at the earliest possible occasion.  
'Hello Patrick.'  
'You really do look beautiful. I'm sure most of that is due to your natural beauty but I cannot imagine you looking lovelier than you do right now.'  
'You've barely seen my uh 'natural beauty'. When you last saw me I was tired and had outdated hair, clothes and no make-up. I have had a somewhat intensive crash course from Trixie about all that. It was...mildly terrifying. From this point on I'll look better in day to day life than I did that evening I promise. I uh...I want you to feel proud to have me on your arm.' She blushed.  
'You looked beautiful that evening too. I will always be proud to have you on my arm no matter how dated or make-upless or covered in someone else's blood you are. I wanted to tell you how beautiful you are that evening but you seemed somewhat overwhelmed with everything and I feared that would push you over the edge. Too much too soon. I'm sorry it had to be cut short so suddenly.'  
'It's fine. Even if it wasn't one of my dearest friends you went to help I would understand. Babies don't stick to plans, we both know that. And people will always get into accidents or scrapes and need your assistance. It's what you do. It's who you are. I know what I'm getting into. I'm sure that was the first of many nights and plans to go askew. So long as you're helping people and not just blowing me off to go to the pub with your friends-not that I'd ever stop you going to the pub with your friends-just don't lie to me about it.'  
'I'm glad you understand. Just a few points regarding that though. #1 I'll always go reluctantly if it takes me from spending time with you, #2 I'm not really the type to go to the pub, #3 I don't actually have many friends outside of Nonnatus but even if I did you'd come before them and #4 I don't think I could ever lie to a woman as honest and as wonderful as you.'  
'Thank you. That was a very lovely thing to hear.' Shelagh blushed further into her lap.  
'Well I'm never going to stop saying them to you.' He grinned raising he hand to his lips once more.  
'You're too kind. How is Timothy? I haven't seen him since I ran out the door.'  
'He's fine. Still on half term, still bored, still complaining. He's had a million and one questions about you and us. He's very happy about this by the way. He practically pushed me out of the door earlier so I wouldn't be late. I haven't seen him this happy in years. And it's all thanks to you. I can never thank you enough for all you've done for Timothy since his mother died. You've been invaluable, a wonder, a rock. Especially at the fete when you did the 3 legged race with him. He was talking about that for weeks you know. He spent well over a month talking about you non-stop. Which was unfortunate considering I was trying to forget about you and what I'd done. I truly am sorry for my behaviour in the kitchen that day. No matter what you say it was unforgivable. I should never have put you in that position.'  
'If you hadn't then I wouldn't have forced myself to face my feelings for you. To accept the fact that this wasn't going away. That I wanted to be with you. If you hadn't have kissed me we might not be here today. So I'm so very glad I fell over and you kissed me. And I adore Timothy. It was my honour to run the 3 legged race with him and I'm glad I was the one he could turn to when he needed someone. As for his boredom you should send him to Nonnatus. I'm not allowed to do much around the convent so I can convalesce. And Chummy is coming back tomorrow so she will be on bed rest for a while. I'm sure between the 3 of us and Freddie we can have a grand old time. I'd be happy to spend some time with Timothy. He's truly a wonderful boy.'  
'He thinks the world of you. He must take after his old man. Ah here we are.' He said as they turned into a drive.  
'The Kings Inn?'

'It's not just your typical inn. It's been upgraded inside. Not too fancy though-don't want to be scaring you off before we begin.'  
'It looks lovely Patrick.' She reassured him seeing the nervous look on his face.  
'Shall we go in?' Seeing her troubled expression he frowned. 'Shelagh? Are you alright?' He took her hand. 'We don't have to do this if you don't want? Is this moving too fast for you? Darling? I can take you home if you want.'  
'I like that.' She smiled shyly.  
'You do want me to take you home?' He frowned. As much as it would hurt to slow this he would take a step back if it was what she wanted. So long as the two of them ended up together he did not mind how long it took.

'No! Not that! Please don't take me home. I just...I liked it when you called me darling.' She admitted smiling into her lap.  
'I'm glad.' He smiled lifting her chin so he could look her in the eyes. 'What's wrong then?'  
'I've uh...never done this before. Going out for dinner with someone. Dating. I'm not quite sure how I'm supposed to be. What I'm supposed to do. I've listened to the nurses raving about dates they've been on but it's very different when it's suddenly me.'  
'You don't need to be anything except yourself Shelagh. We're far enough from Poplar that no-one will know us. We can just be Patrick and Shelagh, two people who care for each other, eating good food and having a good time getting to know each other better. It's not as if we're complete strangers.' He grinned.  
'I guess. You're right of course. Sorry.'  
'There's nothing to be sorry about. It's understandable to be nervous. You've really never dated anyone before? Not in Scotland or whilst you were doing your nurses training?' He frowned, confused.  
'No. No-one ever showed any interest.'  
'I find that hard to believe-you're beautiful and wonderful and, well, you're you. All those men must have been blind or stupid. Their loss is my gain.' He grinned at her, still unable to believe that such a woman would ever even consider being with him, let alone leave behind her vocation and such a personal relationship with God for him.  
'Shall we go in?' Shelagh smiled gratefully at him as she brought his hands to her lips.  
'Let's.'

* * *

'Are you ready to order?' The waiter appeared by their table. Shelagh looked panicked at Patrick, unprepared for answering.

'Uh...I'm afraid I don't know what a lot of this is. Can you help me Patrick?'  
'Of course. 2 tomato soups to start and for mains-you like chicken don't you? Good, she'll have the chicken and I'll have the gammon please. Would you like some wine Shelagh?'  
'I guess.'  
'Red or white?'  
'I don't really have a preference. Whatever you would prefer' She stuttered, completely lost in the current situation.  
'And a bottle of red please. Can we have some water too?' Secretly Patrick thought she looked rather adorable so flustered though he did not think she would appreciate that thought being vocalised.  
'Of course sir. Anything else?'  
'No thank you. We'll order dessert after the course.'  
'Very good sir. I'll bring the drinks over shortly.'  
'Thank you. So, Shelagh Mannion. Who are you? I want to know everything.'  
'A lot of the information I possess about Shelagh Mannion is a decade out of date.' She smirked.  
'True. Well I hope we can learn more recent information together.' He smiles as he took her hand in his.  
'I'd like that. Well my childhood is just the same either way. I was born on the 19 th April 1927 in Aberdeen. My middle name is Marsali. I grew up just outside Aberdeen with my parents Annelies and Ruaidhrigh and my twin sister Morag. My mother died when I was 5 and my father when we were 16. We had a border collie called Tyke, a black lab called Bob, 2 ginger cats called Jane and Austen, a tabby called Bronte and black and white cat called Dickens. Mother was a classics enthusiast; she studied literature at university but gave up her career to raise Mori and me. She instilled a great love of literature into us, even in the short time we had together. We had a farm and I used to spend hours chasing those dogs around the fields.'  
'What kind of farm was it?'  
'Cattle. Our Aberdeen Angus Beef was much sought after-we supplied shops for miles around.' She said proudly. 'We also had a couple of pigs; the experience of having them came in unexpected use last year. Did we ever tell you about Evie and co? No? Remind me to tell you some time. I think you'd greatly enjoy the tale. Oh how I loved growing up on that farm. Our uncle Andrew took us in after Daddy died. He had a large house in Edinburgh so we sold the farm to some family friends who were also in the business. A few years later I started nursing college and then joined the order. Then I met you.' She grinned.  
'How did your parents die? If you don't mind me asking?' He asked delicately, noting the sadness in her eyes.  
'I don't mind, and I will tell you, tonight. Just not right now. Dad's death in particular is still very raw and not exactly dinner table appropriate.' She said awkwardly.  
'I understand. You said Morag was your twin? Identical? What does she do? Do you have any nephews or nieces? '  
'No but very similar. She has red hair and mum's nose but other than that we're fairly identical. Or we were 10 years ago when we last saw each other in person. I wrote to her last known location earlier today so I hope we will back in contact soon. I have missed her terribly and I can't wait for you two to meet. We've stayed in mild contact over the last decade but the Order is quite strict about retaining ties to our pre-order lives. She was a teacher in Wales as of Christmas though she did seem to be somewhat bored at that school. She was unmarried and childless too. She'll settle down eventually I'm sure. She just seems to be enjoying life as it comes. She was always the more relaxed one out of us. I always liked to make sure I knew what I was doing and when. She'd chance it. I always envied her that.' She smiled ruefully. 'What about your childhood? Was it as adventurous as I'd imagine? Thank you.' She smiled at the newly arrived waiter who poured their drinks. He nodded at the pair before retreating. Carefully Shelagh lifted her glass, wary of spilling the dark red liquid on herself or the tablecloth. Barely restraining a smile at her antics Patrick clinked his glass against hers.  
'To us. Patrick and Shelagh. No longer must we only be Dr Turner and Sister Bernadette.'  
'To us.' She took a small sip of her drink and was pleasantly surprised. It was actually rather nice.  
'Where were we? Ah yes. Sorry to disappoint but I was always a boring child, there was nothing more I'd love than sitting up a tree reading. Like your mother and you I had, and still have, a great interest in the classics though I will read just about anything so long as it isn't one of those trashy romance novels Nurse Franklin reads. I saw it on the kitchen at Nonnatuns once.' He explained to her confused look. 'My brother would try and knock me down my throwing stocks and shoes at me. Oh it was all in good fun.' He laughed seeing her frown. 'I have an older brother and a younger sister Thomas and Elisabeth, affectionately known by the family as Pudge and Lissa. We grew up in a street in west London, an affectionate rabble belonging to Sarah and Harry Turner-a doctor and a housewife of high birth who was disowned by her family for 17 years due to her marrying my father. They're both still alive and well and in close to them and my siblings. Pudge is married with 2 children Robert and Bethany and Lissa with 1, Catherine. Pudge is a lawyer in Cambridge and Lissa is an artist who moves around a lot. We never had any animals growing up, my mum is allergic to cat hair and Lissa was scared of dogs. She loves them now though. Great timing' He chuckled. 'Timothy is desperate for a dog but I'm not at home enough for that to be feasible unfortunately.'  
'That's a shame.'  
'I think you and Lissa will get on very well when you meet. Oh and my birthday is August 4 th and my middle name is James. Do you have any hobbies? Were you even allowed hobbies in the Order? Did you paint the picture on the postcard you sent Timothy? Thank you for that by the way, he missed you dreadfully. Almost as much as his father did.'  
'My pleasure. Yes, I painted it. I've always loved to paint ever since I was a little girl. Dad taught me, he was a fabulous artist. He could have been a professional but he loved our farm far too much to turn his back on it. I also sketch occasionally. In the order I rarely had time to do either but I picked up the habit, no pun intended, again whilst I was at the Sanatorium. I'd forgotten how much I loved it. You know sister Julienne is actually a very skilled artist herself. Many of the paintings around Nonnatus were done by her.'  
'You're really very good at painting too. Timothy framed the picture you painted him. It's on his bedroom wall, pride of place.'  
'Thank you. That's very sweet. Perhaps I should paint something for you seeing as Timothy already has one.'  
'I'd like that. Ah good, the starters are here.'


	9. Chapter 9

**The First Date 2/2**

**Shoutout to Rockbird86, Muffyinturnerland and ctmsundays on tumblr for their responses on the last chapter. Kissy kissies for you ;) xx**

* * *

'Would you like to dance?' Patrick offered as they finished their dessert-a slice of the most succulent, decadent chocolate cake either had ever tasted. They had enjoyed their meal and both were pleasantly surprised by how natural the past hour had seemed, the conversation had flowed easily, both were relaxed and joking with each other.

'I can't dance Patrick.' She admitted, hanging her head in shame. She had attended a few Ceilidhs' as a young girl with Morag and their friends but she had never been overly talented, much to the amusements of her friends as she often ended up on the floor or being spun into walls or people.

'Honestly darling neither can I particularly well but it can't be too complicated. I'm sure between the two of us we can muddle our way through it, perhaps even enjoy it.' He grinned as she giggled and took his proffered hand. He led her onto the dance floor area and tentatively slipped an arm around her back. Nervously she put her hand on his shoulder as she had seen the nurses do whilst dancing around the living room. Stepping closer to close the gap Patrick had allowed between them Shelagh smiled up at him. He beamed down at her as they began to sway gently as they let the music wash over them. For several minutes the pair was lost in each other's gaze, finally allowing themselves to stare at their beloved, not having to worry about anyone else or propriety or rules. Though neither were natural dancers the actions seemed to come instinctively, both thinking about how right this seemed and how much they never wanted to leave each other's embrace. Shelagh broke the gaze to rest her cheek against his chest. She couldn't believe that she had ever considered the feelings she felt towards the man she was pressed against could be wrong. Nothing had ever felt more right. She had no doubts that this relationship was given to her by God.

'Shelagh I know I said this in my letters but I need to tell you in person. I love you Shelagh Mannion.'

'I love you too Patrick Turner.' She beamed up at him, her cheeks aching with the strain of the widest grin she had ever sported. Never had she imagined that hearing 3 words, even if she had already read them, could bring such uncontrollable joy into her heart. When she had joined the order, a little over 10 years ago, she thought she had forfeited the chance to ever hear such words directed at her. Never in her wildest dreams about her life post Order had she felt such happiness.

'May I kiss you Shelagh?'

'If you don't I will.' She breathed leaning into him. Smiling he bent to meet her in the middle and brushed his lips against hers reverently. He began to pull back, eager to make sure Shelagh was still okay with this new development however the love that exuded from her gaze stopped him dead. It was Shelagh who initiated their 2nd kiss, reaching on tiptoe to take his lower lip between hers. Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth Patrick shook himself out of his bliss and kissed her back, swiftly taking back control. The pair continued swaying for several minutes, exchanging kisses and exaltations of love until a faster paced song began to play. They returned to their seats and the waiter came over with the bill. Sighing sadly Patrick paid and helped Shelagh into her coat.

'I don't want this evening to end.' She admitted as they walked out hand in hand.

'It doesn't have to. Would you like to go for a walk along the river? There's a full moon tonight so we should be able to see our way quite easily. Unless you'd rather not walk off into the dark without a chaperone. Not that I would ever compromise you.' He asked offering up his arm. Beaming she nodded and took it.

'That sounds lovely Patrick. Dinner, dancing and a moonlit walk. The nurses are going to be very jealous when they force me to tell them every single detail about tonight.' She laughed as they began to walk.

'You'll love it really.' He laughed.

'Yes. I will.' She leaned into his arm. They walked for a few minutes in silence before they reached a bench. Sighing heavily Shelagh leant her head on his shoulder.

'Are you alight my love? Are you cold? World you like my coat?'

'No it's not that. I promised you earlier that I would tell you the full story of my parents and my childhood. And now seems as good a time as any but I don't want to ruin this most perfect of evenings.'

'Whatever you tell me cannot run this night. It can only make us closer. But I don't want to feel like I'm forcing you to tell me something you do not wish to share. If you're not ready then that is fine.'

'Thank you. Okay. Here goes. You are the only person besides Mother, that is Sister Julienne, who knows this about me. It isn't all rainbows and bunnies but it is a big part of Shelagh Mannion and I want, nae, I need you to know this. As I mentioned my mother died when I was 5 years old, she haemorrhaged labouring my little brother. He also did not survive. It was a late-term miscarriage. We were too grief stricken to name him at the time, he was somewhat overlooked by losing Mum, but about 7 months later we set up a memorial area for him. We called him Naomhán. It means little Saint. Daddy always told us that he was called home because he was needed.' She said sadly. He squeezed her hand and signalled for her to continue. 'I don't remember Mum very well but sometimes, when I close my eyes I can see her rolling about in the garden with Tyke and I can vaguely recall her voice as she sang Celtic lullabies to us until we slept. I still miss her dreadfully. Although I have Sister Julienne who is like my mother I can never forget Mum. It was just the 3 of us then-Da, Mori and I. The three musketeers Da would call us. Oh how we loved him and he loved us back dearly. We were as close as any parent/child could ever hope to be, inseparable in fact. Don't get me wrong-Mori and I had many, many dear friends who I hope to reconnect with but nobody was as important or special as our father. Mori and I were also extremely close, still are in a way. As a member of my religious order we are not allowed to keep close contact with our relatives, we're supposed to leave behind our old lives but we've made the most of the small amount of contact we're allowed. As we got older the three of us only continued to grow closer. When we were 16 Da was killed in an accident on the farm. We both saw it happen. It was…horrific-the engine on the tractor exploded and Da had his head under the bonnet to look it over. As he fell back the first thing we noticed was…was...' She broke off, a sob catching in her throat. He pulled her into his side, arm wrapped around her.

'You don't have to tell me.' He said planting a kiss on the top of her head.

'No, it's okay. Just…memories.' She raised his hands to her lips and kissed him thankfully. 'As he jumped back it was clear that he had a giant shard of metal sticking out of his eye, it wasn't until he began to twist as he fell that it became abundantly obvious that there was a considerable chunk of his skull missing. It wouldn't have been nearly as bad had he died instantly. Instead he lay there, choking on his own blood with us sobbing over him, shocked and powerless to help. He'd also got shrapnel in his windpipe so he could barely breathe. He died less than 20 seconds after hitting the ground but even in those last moments he was trying to comfort Mori and I.' She told through sobs. 'I was so distraught afterwards that I barely spoke a word for 5 months. Morag and I would cling on to each other for hours on end in silence just staring off into space. Our father's brother, our Uncle Andrew took us in. He was not an unpleasant man though we far from enjoyed our time there. He and Da fell out years before and he'd only taken us in to save face in Edinburgh-he'd got into a bit of trouble and the community had turned their back on him. He was not cruel exactly. We would only see him at meals, if you could call what he gave us food. The dogs were fed better than my sister and I. They were his pride and joy. He rarely let us out aside from school and church, made us work around the house to earn our keep. He tried but failed to access our inheritance and the money from the sale of the farm. That was ours and only a small amount was used to pay our way by the government. The minute we finished school and got our qualifications we ran to London with money our friend Jamie had loaned us. We soon managed to get access to our own bank account; we shared one, thinking about it we probably still do. I hope Morag hadn't spent it all; I should probably look into that. I entered nursing college and Mori went to university. We continued to live with each other for as long as we could. 3 years later I joined the convent and then I met you. You know the rest.'

'Oh my darling. You are so strong. Thank you for telling me. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Your father sounds like a wonderful man. So does your mother. I wish I could have met them.'

'He would've liked you. A learned man with a big enough heart to encompass the whole community who isn't afraid to get his hands dirty in the name of good. You've made these last few days the happiest of my life. For that he would love you, not quite as much as I do but I don't believe it is possible to love another human as much as I do you.' She admitted kissing his shoulder next to where her head currently lay.

'Oh Shelagh. My beautiful, strong, brave, incredible, loving Shelagh. I don't know what I have done to deserve you but it must have been rather spectacular.' He lifted her face to his and kissed her once more. Pulling back he used the sleeve of his coat to brush the tears from her cheek. 'I wish I could save you from the pain. Nobody deserves to go through that. I wish I could help you.'

'You do my love. Being in your arms brings me such strength and peace. I have never been this happy. I love you so much Patrick.'

'I'm glad. I love you too. So so much. I can't believe you want to be with me.'

'Well I do.' She said with an air of finality. He leant down and pressed his lips to hers once more. This time more fiercely and she was powerless to stop her arms wrapping around his neck as her turned to face him more directly. She was pleasantly surprised when he ran her tongue against her lips, she wasn't sure what it meant but instinctively she opened her mouth to him and soon both tongues were battling to show greater devotion to the other. She shivered.

'As much as I am enjoying this and you, I should get you home. We can't have you getting ill so soon after leaving the Sanatorium, that wouldn't be good for my professional reputation. And I don't want a barrage of angry nuns and nurses chasing me through Poplar with flaming pitchforks.'

'In glad my health means so much to you.' She said dryly.

* * *

'Well. Here we are.' He said sadly as they pulled up outside Nonnatus House once more.

'I don't want to get out. Getting out means I won't be with you anymore.' She frowned. 'I don't want tonight to end.'

'It's not forever I promise. I'm busy the next few days during the day but I can clear an evening or two and I'm sure I can pop in and see you. Would you like to come over for dinner? I'm sure Mrs Taylor can rustle up something marvellous.'

'Yes. When?'

'The day after tomorrow?'

'It's a date.' She grinned

'Yes, it is.' He grinned back at her. 'I have a second date with Sister Bernadette. Who else can say that?'

'Nobody had a first date with Sister Bernadette dearest. And it's the second of many I hope my darling.'

'It would be my honour to take you out every day for the rest of your life. Come on, I'll walk you to your door.'

'A proper gentleman I see.'

'Only for you my love'. The exited the car and walked up the stone steps to the convent whereupon Shelagh threw herself into his arms. Out the corner of her eye she noticed one of the living room curtains twitching. She found she could not care less who was watching. She was proud of this love and wanted to share it with those she loved. Though she had been uncomfortable even discussing the date in the vicinity of Sister Evangelina she knew now that nothing could stop her from spending the rest of her life with the man whose arms were already becoming home to her. Sister Evangelina would just have to get used to the idea.

'I love you so much Patrick. This has been the perfect evening. I don't know how you're going to top this with our second'

'I love you too my darling Shelagh. So very much. I'm so glad we found our way to each other.' He droppped a kiss onto the top of her head as she grinned into his chest.

'As am I sweetheart. This is what God wants for me, for us. I know you do not believe but I truly think that. He guided us together.' She said softly.

'I don't know. I find myself starting to believe that there may be something, someone, out there. How else can I explain being blessed by the love of the most beautiful woman in the whole world? When you are in my arms, when you look at me with such love in your eyes, it feels …sacred.' He explained as she began to tear up at his words.

'Oh Patrick. How can I leave you after you say such a beautiful thing?' She stroked his cheek tenderly

'Because if you leave then you can sleep and then we can see each other tomorrow. Is it alright if Timothy comes over?'

'Of course. If he is agreed.'

'Darling no force on earth could keep him away. I'll bring him around mid-morning.'

'I look forward to it. Goodnight.'

'Goodnight.' They kissed once more before she turned and walked through the door grinning to herself.


	10. Chapter 10

The moment she crossed the threshold to the building she was instantly assaulted by several nighty clad nurses. To be honest it was beyond the time that they should have been in bed-they had a big day tomorrow with Chummy coming home and could do with the rest. They didn't care though-instead surging forward to crowd around her.

'So? How was it?'

'Where did he take you?'

'Did you have a nice time?'

'Did he kiss you?'

'Did you only eat? What else did you do?'

'Ladies please! One question at a time! And at least let me fully through the front door before you all pile on me. I'm letting a draft in. Do you want Sister Evangelina storming around here tomorrow because I've given her a chill?' Shelagh laughed as they moved back to allow her to close the door.

'Sorry.' They chuckled. 'It's just so exciting!'

'Shall we go to my room? I get the impression were going to be talking for a while if Trixie gets her way.' She chuckled as Trixie frowned.

'But I want to know now!'

'Are you about to throw a tantrum?' Shelagh giggled at the absurdity of her friends behaviour. It had only been a few days since she had changed her inter-Nonnatus position but already she could see a marked difference in the way the nurses interacted with her. No longer would they bite their tongue around her or act as professional. Still the image of a woman in her mid 20's about to throw a temper tantrum shocked her slightly. 'Either you can wait until we get upstairs and I get ready for bed then I can tell you what you wish to hear or you can wait until tomorrow to question me to death. It's your choice. Sorry-that sounded a bit strict.'

'It's fine. I always like it when my friends act like my mother.'

'Gee thanks. Now let me get changed and tucked up snug in bed.

'Fine.' Trixie huffed. 'But hurry.' She pulled Shelagh down the hall to the nurses quarters. she shoved her playfully through the day.

'I will see you four in about 5 minutes in my room then.' Shelagh grinned. 'Now scoot.'

'You are such a mum.'

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK

'Can we come in now?' Cynthia called through the door.

'Yes. Enter. I am now ready for the inevitable interrogation.' Shelagh laughed as she settled under her sheets. It had amused her the first night to note that the nurses, and now her, had sheets that were much softer and kinder on the skin than the ones she had had as a nun. She wondered if that was a nationwide thing or something implemented by a previous Nonnutus nun-it could not have been Sister Julienne's idea as she had not been the chief nun when Shelagh had entered as a postulant.

'Now will you answer our questions?' Trixie asked impatiently as they scurried in and jumped onto Shelagh's bed.

'Ask away. You have 20 questions. Complete honesty time-once in a lifetime opportunity here. One question at a time though.'

'Okay. Where did he take you?'

'An upscale pub/restaurant about half an hour away called The Kings Inn.'

'Was it any good?'

'It was wonderful. We had soup and then I had chicken and Patrick had gammon. Then we had chocolate cake for dessert. The food was delicious, the music was lovely, the wine surpringly okay considering I grew up hearing everyone complaining about it and the company was above sublime.' She grinned.

'What did you do?'

'We ate our food and talked. A lot. After we were finished we took advantage of the live band and dance floor and we danced for a while. Once the music became livelier and beyond our capabilities-neither one of us is about to win any dance competitions believe me- we returned to our seats. After the bill was payed we didn't want the evening to end just yet so we took a moonlit stroll along the river.'

'Aww. That's so romantic.'

'Yes it was rather. It was, overall, perfect.'

'What did you talk about?'

'Our childhoods, our family, the friends we had growing up, Timothy, you lot, Chummy, food, my immediate future. We covered quite a few topics really. It's strange-I've never been an overly talkative person but it's so easy talking to him now that I know he will always listen and I do not have to censor myself or hide my love for him.'

'I know what you mean. It was so much more easy to talk to Samuel once I had taken the first step.' She said referring to the Reverend Apply-Thornton, they had progressed past being pen pals and were now pursuing a long distance relationship, visiting each other as often as possible.

'You should be very proud of the progress you've made whilst here Jane. Can you imagine if you could tell yourself 8 months ago that you would be here-quiet but an active part in conversations, with the attentions of a localish reverend who dotes on you?' Shelagh smiled taking Jane's hand in hers. 'I know I'm certainly very proud of you.'

'Thank you.' Jane blushed deeply but could not fight the growing smile that threatened to reveal itself.

'Gosh-who'd have imagined that out of everyone at Nonnatus the only ones with boyfriends or husbands would be Chummy-a self proclaimed walking disaster, Jane who barely said a word for the first week we knew her and Sister Bernadette!' Jenny laughed as they all chuckled.

'I thought you were interested in Jimmy's friend?' Shelagh grinned. 'What?' She responded to the others' shocked looks. 'Just because I was in a different county doesn't mean I don't hear gossip!'

'Trixie!'

'Not me I'm afraid.'

'The walls have ears you know.' Shelagh cackled as the women looked increasingly confused as they pointed accusingly at each other, only to met by affronted looks or 'not me's.

'Who told you then?'

'A little bird.'

'Shelagh! I though you said it was complete honesty time.'

'I am entitled to some secrets you know. Though I do appear to have spilt quite a few over the past few days to various people.'

'Fair enough. But getting away from the point! Shelagh's first date! On with the questions!'

'So you talked about us?' Jane smiled.

'Of course. You and the nuns and how you've all taken my personal 180. How wonderful you all are. How terrified of Sister Evangelina he should probably be for his own safety.' Shelagh grinned at them

'Did he kiss you?'

'I saw the curtains twitch whilst we were saying goodbye. You know perfectly well he kissed me tonight.' The nurses had the good grace to look guilty. 'It's okay, I don't blame you. I'd have done the same given the situation. The former nun you live with and the local doctor-it's quite an intriguing situation I imagine.'

'Was that your first kiss?' Trixie asked, wide eyed as she asked the question she'd been dying to ask ever since Sister Bernadette had implied she had not yet had her first kiss, all those months ago when the Reverend Appleby-Thornton had temporarily joined them. At the time she had thought it possible but the more she thought upon it, and the more she studied Sister Bernadette, she had concluded that the nun was probably quite pretty under habit. She could only imagine what a teenager version of the nun had looked like. In a sudden burst of smugness Trixie realised she was correct-Shelagh was VERY pretty without the habit. Really quite beautiful. She had to admire Dr Turner for noticing it.

'The one on the steps? No. Tonight? Yes.' Shelagh grinned as the memories flooded through her mind. She felt a blush begin to rise in her cheeks at the memory of the not so chaste kisses they had exchanged by the river.

'It was?! Oh how sweet! Well? Tell us about it then.' Trixie demanded, bouncing up and down on the bed excitedly.

'It was ...completely perfect. Better than I could ever have imagined.' She sighed happily.

'How often have you imagined it?'

'Enough times for it to be inappropriate behaviour for a nun.'

'That could be anywhere between 1 and many hundreds.'

'Indeed.'

'How did it happen?' Cynthia asked, cutting off the upcoming protestation from Trixie.

'We'd been dancing for about 10 minutes when he suddenly pulled me flush up against him and told me he loved me for the first time. Well, the first time in person.'

'Awwww.'

'Then he leant down and kissed me. To be honest I think he thought I was about to break at first it was so delicate. It was quite sweet actually. That uh…was the first of many kisses we shared tonight.' Shelagh admitted blushing.

'He sounds quite the gentleman.' Cynthia beamed.

'He was. He is. I'm very lucky.'

'Is he a good kisser? I can't believe I just asked that about Doctor Turner.' Jenny gaped.

'I don't have anything to compare it to but I would definitely have to say yes. I did rather enjoy it so he must have been doing something right. You'd better get used to the idea of Doctor Turner kissing me because it is going to happen a lot if I have any say in it.'

'Shelagh! I...I can't believe you just said that.'

'Honestly neither can I. Gah I'm so in love with him I can hardly believe it.' Shelagh grinned burrowing face first into her pillow. 'Stop laughing at me.'

'Sorry. You're adorable. And this is still very surreal.'

'Believe me it's weirder for me.'

'But you had months of feelings leading up to this. We've had 2 days after it came out of the blue.'

'I spent 10 years as Sister Bernadette not even being able to fully be as much friends with you as I wanted or act upon how close I am to Sister Julienne, I certainly could never even think about romance. Now, all of a sudden I'm Shelagh Mannion again and I can laugh and joke with you, openly and and publicly accept Sister Julienne as my Mother and I spent a good 20 minutes kissing the local GP tonight in the moonlight. And several more in other places.'

'Wow. I always knew you and Sister Julienne had a special connection but I never realised you considered her your mother.' Cynthia said softly as the others gaped.

'I have done for many years.' Shelagh admitted drawing her knees up to her chest. 'I was really quite young when I first came here as a postulant and I was suddenly living a very different life and very far from home and my friends. I suddenly couldn't see Mori anymore and we were practically inseparable at that point. That was the hardest part for me. I would not have survived my early years without Mum. I love her very much.'

'She loves you too you know. She looked so heartbroken when she told us about your diagnosis and when she informed us that you may well be leaving the order, and by extension, though she didn't actually say it, leaving her.'

'I know she does. We had quite the heart to heart yesterday. We did some reminiscing, some hugging, a lot of hugging in fact. Nonnatus truly is my family in more than just words. I love each and every one of you dearly. I have been blessed with you.'

'Aw Shelagh we love you too.' Cynthia wrapped her arm around Shelagh's shoulder as the blonde leant into her.

'It really is isn't it. A family. Our Nonnatus family. We're like sisters, always have been really-even as a nun you were closer to a sister than the the other Sisters who are like mothers or aunts.'

'What's Fred then?'

'Cousin? Same with Peter-I know he's married to our sister but it's not the same as a brother.' Jenny suggested.

'Maybe. We should let you sleep else the Sisters will kill us tomorrow. Your mother in particular.'

'Night ladies. And thank you for helping me get ready, I would have been utterly lost.'

'Our pleasure. Goodnight Shelagh Mannion.'

'Goodnight family.' Shelagh giggled as they filed out. Flopping back onto her pillow she let out a laugh of joy as the past few hours activity.


	11. Chapter 11

'Good morning my dear. Toast? I'm afraid you've missed main breakfast. As it should be-you need your sleep. I'd prefer it if you were still in bed now but I feel that isn't a battle I'd win. I'll get Mrs B to start leaving some porridge aside for you.' Sister Julienne smiled as Shelagh wandered into the kitchen, a wide grin plastered across her face.

'Please.'

'Did you have a good time last night? You certainly seem to have. I must admit the smile you are currently sporting could light up the room.' Sister Julienne chuckled as Shelagh's grin grew even wider.

'I had a wonderful time thank you. Patrick was quite the gentleman. Oh Mum it was so great! I was worried that it would be awkward but it wasn't. It was perfect.'

'Oh I am pleased. Where did you go?'

'The Kings Inn. It's about half an hour away from here.'

'Was the food good?'

'Delicious. We'd best keep Sister Monica Joan away from there else she'd never leave the dessert display. Between you and me the chocolate cake there is incredible. Oh and it turns out that with the right partner I CAN dance!'

'I imagine you weren't dancing any ceilidh dances though-as I recall those were the ones you got most injured during.' Sister Julienne chuckled remembering the many tales she had heard over the years. A particular favourite of hers had been the one where Shelagh had been spun too ferociously, lost her balance and flown into a too close table, tripped over the table leg and flew into the arms of Shelagh's unsuspecting Maths teacher, toppling the man and ending up lying on top of the poor man.

'And we went for a moonlit walk along the river. I had no idea how nice that could be! I'd heard Trixie gushing over the idea in the past but always thought it silly- what if you got lost or cold? But it was lovely. Oh and he told me he loved me, in person. And he kissed me. Eep I'm so happy!' Shelagh could barely contain the happiness bubbling inside of her and ended up almost bouncing on her toes.

'Oh my darling girl I am so happy for you. It's wonderful seeing you so happy again. It broke my heart to see you so despondent and conflicted this past 6 months or so.'

'Thank you. I told him about Da's death. And about Uncle Andrew.' Shelagh admitted suddenly.

'You did? That was quick. How did he take it?' The nun frowned. She knew from experience about how emotional Shelagh could get about the tragic end of her childhood and the terrible treatment she had suffered immediately after. Many nights towards the beginnings of their relationship Shelagh would wake up screaming in the night-still reliving that terrible day.

'Very well. I'm very lucky to have him. And I know it was quick but I want to go into this with no secrets.'

'That sounds wise.'

'What time is chummy due back from hospital?'

'Around 3pm.'

'Wonderful. Timothy may be visiting later by the way. He's terribly bored because it's half term and Patrick's too busy to do much with him. Apparently he's missed me dreadfully and has many questions for me.'

'That'll be nice for you. Don't overseer yourself. I've seen you with him before-you can be quite energetic.'

'I won't. Don't worry so Mum. Wha-' Shelagh yelled as sister Julienne suddenly sprung forwards and hugged her, wrapping her arms around Shelagh's waist from the side. 'You alright?' Shelagh asked wrapping an arm around the nun.'

'I just really love it when you call me Mum.' She admitted.

'Well get used to it. As long as there is breath in these lungs I will call you it.'

'Thank you. I should go-paperwork beckons.'

'Would you like some help until Timothy turns up? That way I can help out and not feel so useless whilst barely expending any energy.'

'I'd love some.'

* * *

'Peter, do you think the nuns mind that we're bringing Freddie back to stay at Nonnatus. What if we're imposing ourselves?'

'Of course they don't. They love you and understand that we currently have nowhere else to live. They're not about to throw us out onto the streets. Especially after you were so ill and we have a new-born.'

'He's beautiful isn't he? Oh Peter we're so lucky. God has been so good to us.'

'Indeed we are Camilla. He sure has. I look at you, alive and well and cradling our son and I'm sure I am the luckiest, happiest man on the earth. I love you Camilla.'

'I love you too Peter.'

* * *

'So? Does sis-Shelagh still want to walk out with you? We're still in with a chance?' Timothy asked impatiently. They had been eating their breakfast in silence, Timothy desperate to know whether Shelagh was still going to a part of their lives. He hoped so. The months that she has spent in the Sanatorium had been unbearable. He had so wanted to visit her but every time he asked his father, the man either pretended not to hear the request or ended up snapping at him. Then suddenly there were racing through the countryside to find her and now they were dating. He couldn't bear it if she now wouldn't be there in their lives

'Good morning to you too Timothy.'

'Sorry, good morning Dad-does Shelagh still love you?'

'Yes son.' He chuckled 'Shelagh still loves me. We had a wonderful time. Thank you for the help with dressing me-Shelagh was most appreciative.'

'You're sure? She wasn't just pretending.'

'Well she kissed me and told me she did not want the evening to end. Oh and her eyes were alight with joy.'

'Dad don't be soppy. It's gross.'

'Well if Shelagh and I continue to date which I strongly suspect will happen then you'll have to get used to it.'

'Dad. Are you going to marry Shelagh?' Timothy asked suddenly causing Patrick to choke on his tea.

'It's a bit early for that son. We've only been on one date.'

'She left behind her life as a nun to be with you.' Tim pointed out. 'That sounds like she's pretty committed to this.'

'She did indeed Tim, but not necessarily just for me. She hasn't been truly happy as a nun for over a year apparently.'

'Oh. Well do you want to marry her Dad?'

'Yes. I do. Very much so. But only if that would be alright with you. She'd move in and you'd have a stepmother.'

'I really want you to marry her Dad. I still miss Mummy a whole lot but she isn't coming back. I think she'd be happy that we have Shelagh though.'

'That's very mature of you Tim.' Patrick said proudly.

'Mum wanted us to be happy. And Sister Bernadette made me happy, and when she came over a few days ago Shelagh made me happy. I...I love her.'

'She loves you too. She told me as much last night.'

'She does?!'

'How could she not? But Tim if and when I propose to Shelagh it'll be a little while down the line. I want to date her properly and to let her get used to being Shelagh again. That means you can't say anything to her. I would imagine that it would be at least a few months before I ask her.'

'Months? But that's ages away! Can't she come live with us now and you can propose later!'

'Uhh no Tim. That wouldn't be appropriate. And you shouldn't say that to Shelagh, you may embarrass her.'

'Why?'

'I'll explain when you're older.'

'That's what you always say.'

'And I promise one day I'll tell you everything. But hurry now, I'm due at the surgery soon.'

'Yay, another day of sorting and cleaning glass tubes!'

'Don't be cheeky. And actually you're not coming with me.'

'You're leaving me at home? Alone?'

'No. You're to spend the day at Nonnatus House with Shelagh. If you want to of course.'

'Yes please!'

'And Akela is coming home from the hospital today so you'll be able to see her too.'

'Awesome! She is alright now isn't she?'

'Yes. And now she has the baby so she'll be happy too. I'm sure she wouldn't mind you meeting little Freddie.'

'Will you and Shelagh have a baby do you think?'

'You're really asking the big questions today aren't you? I haven't spoken to Shelagh about it but I could certainly imagine it being a possibility. I'd certainly like to.'

'Why didn't you and mummy have more children?'

'Your mother only wanted one or two children and we were perfectly happy with you beyond happy.'

'But you always wanted more?'

'I wanted you to have siblings like I did.'

'Oh. Does Shelagh have any brothers or sisters do you know?'

'A twin sister and a younger brother who uh...died…when he was very young…before he was alive you could say.'

'That's sad.'

'Yes. It is.'

'I think…I think I'd quite like it if you and Shelagh had a baby. She'd be a great mum.'

'When we marry she'll be your stepmum. She'd become a mum to you,

'You said when not if!' Timothy grinned 'Dad, when you do ask Shelagh to marry you...don't mess it up. I'd quite like to have Shelagh as a stepmum.'

'I'll do my best. Now come on now. Enough questions! Is there anything you want to take to Nonnatus with you?'


	12. Chapter 12

KNOCK KNOCK  
'Hello Doctor.' Trixie grinned 'what a surprise. I take it you're here to see our resident Scottish beauty?'  
'Sadly not I.' Patrick said ruffling Tim's hair.  
'I'm spending the day with Shelagh.' He beamed. 'I'm not allowed to tire her out though so I've brought her one of my insect books. I thought we could have a look around the garden.'  
'That sounds... lovely. I'm sure she'll have a grand old time. She was very excited to receive that dead butterfly from you in the Sanatorium-though that could just be because it was from you. Anyway won't you come in the pair of you?' She waved them in.  
'I won't thanks. I've got to dash. I'm already late for the surgery. I'll see you later son. Be good for Shelagh, don't overtire her, no awkward questions...'  
'Don't dishonor the family, I know.' He grinned at his father who rolled his eyes.  
'Less of your cheek please. Bye son, tell Shelagh I'm sorry I couldn't see her this morning.'  
'Will do. Off you trot now Dad.'

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK  
'Shelagh you have a visitor.' Trixie grinned sticking her head around sister Julienne's door.  
'Hmm?' Shelagh looked up and beamed when she saw the young boys head appear around Trixie. She jumped up.  
'Shelagh!' Timothy ran into the room and wrapped his arms around Shelagh's waist, nearly toppling her in the process. Recovering she returned the embrace enthusiastically.  
'Hello Tim. Slightly slower tackling if you please- I'm rather small. It's quite easy to level me.'  
'Sorry. I just missed you.'  
'I missed you too Timmy.' She grinned into his hair.  
'Oh Dad says sorry he couldn't pop in but he's already late for work.'  
'Never mind. That doesn't surprise me. It's you I wanted to see, not him.'  
'So you don't want to see Dad at all?'  
'I didn't say that. Come on , if you're lucky there may be a slice of cake we can liberate for you! I'll see you later Mum, call me if you need any more help with the admin.'  
'I will. Go. Enjoy the cake that certainly hasn't been hidden at all in the cupboard above the sink.'  
'Thanks. Now tell me Tim-has your father ever been on time for something?' Shelagh laughed as she led the young boy out of the room.  
'Not that I recall. Hey Shelagh I brought that book on bugs we were looking at when you came over a few nights ago. I thought we could see what we could find in the garden! I'm not supposed to tire you out else Dad will stop us getting fish and chips for dinner tonight.'  
'You had fish and chips when I came over!'  
'So?'  
'So twice in one week isn't good. I thought the housekeeper cooked for you?' She frowned as they entered the kitchen.  
'Yes...twice this week. She cooks for us occasionally'  
'Heavens, I'm going to have to teach that man to cook.' She sighed faux-dramatically as he smiled.  
'You could just come over and cook for us, and then join us for dinner, and lunch and all of the time in between.'  
'I appreciate the offer Tim but your father needs to learn how to cook anyway. And I've only been seeing your father a few days. It wouldn't be appropriate for me to spend so much time there.'  
'Oh. Can you also make him dress better please? It's embarrassing being seen with him sometimes.'  
'I'm sure I can manage that-I want the man I'm seen with to not be a disgrace. I may have spent 10 years not being allowed to be vain but I still have self respect.' She grinned as he laughed.  
'Is it strange not being a nun anymore?'  
'Yes. But I'm lucky that I've been allowed to stay here and continue as a nurse so it's not completely different.'  
'You're still a nurse? Great! You're a brilliant nurse.'  
'Thank you Timothy. That means a lot. But I'm not allowed to return to work for a while. I'm still recovering from my illness.'  
'But you are better aren't you?' He frowned worriedly.  
'Yes. Don't worry I'm fine. Just tired. Oh, I've just remembered. I have a present for you. As a thank you for helping to save me and for reacting so maturely about your father and I. I'll go get it after cake.'  
'But you have so little money. Dad says I shouldn't let you buy me things.'  
'I have enough money, don't you worry about that. Besides, there's nobody I'd rather spend money on. You're my favourite young man you know. Aha! There it is! And there's 3 slices missing from it. You have to hand it to sister Monica Joan she could find a needle in a haystack if the needle was made of cake. Here you go. Best eat it in here or we'll get crumbs everywhere.'  
'Mmm carrot cake. This is dad's second favourite cake.' Timothy revealed as he took an abnormally large bite out of his slice.  
'Oh is it now? I'll have to remember that. What's his first?'  
'Chocolate. Same as me. But we don't have it very often. What's your favourite type of cake?' He asked desperate to find out as much as he could about the newly revealed woman before him. She would, hopefully, become his step mother very soon and so any chance to become closer to her, and to know her better were welcomed.  
'Almond sponge.'  
'I don't think I've ever had that.'  
I'll save you a slice next time Mrs B makes one. Actually, with all this free time I could get her to teach me.' She lit up at the idea.  
You could spend all of your time with me!' Timothy suggested eagerly.  
'It's a lovely thought but you're back at school in a few days. You'll be far too busy to spend time with little old me.'  
'You're not old. Not as old as dad anyway. He's ancient. How old are you?'  
'I'm 31. But it's not gentlemanly to ask a woman her age.'  
'Sorry. Dad would probably shout at me if he'd heard.'  
'It can be our secret. And you know he only shouts so as to help you become a better person. He's very proud of you you know. I happen to think he's done a very good job. You're a very fine young man.'  
'Thank you.' He mumbled, embarrassed. 'You're pretty decent too. I'm not just saying that because you're dating dad. Though it's very weird and sort of gross to think of dad dating.'  
'Don't think about it too hard then. I remember when I was 14 my dad tried dating again. That was a strange few months.' She chuckled.  
'Did he remarry then?'  
'No. The dating didn't work out for him.'  
'Oh. Is it true you grew up on a farm?'  
'Yes. Back up in Scotland, near Aberdeen.'  
'Do you miss it?'  
'The farm or Aberdeen ?'  
'Both.'  
'Yes. It was a very different way of life. I miss the community more than the location but I do miss the area. During the worst of the smog here I would find myself fantasising about the open fields and the clean air. The animals and the sounds. The freedom to run. But then the fog clears and I can see Poplar again ann I know I'm where I'm supposed to be. With Nonnatus and you and your father, with the mothers and the old men. With the people who need me. I miss Mori dreadfully though.'  
'I'm glad you're here and not in Scotland. It was bad enough when you were in the sani-sanat-'  
'Sanatorium. And thank you. You finished there? Let's go find your present.'

* * *

'Wicked! Thanks Shelagh!' Timothy looked up from his new book to fling his arms around Shelagh who grinned. She was unused to buying for herself, let alone other people so she was been worried that she would mess it up. When she had seen the book in the front window of the bookshop however she knew it was perfect. _English Butterflies and Where To Find Them._ Her mind sprung to the boy instantly and she had dragged the girls into the shop.  
'You're welcome. The nurses were quite amused when they took me shopping for clothes and I got more excited over a butterfly book than the shoes they were trying to persuade me to buy.'  
'Butterflies are better than shoes.' He agreed sagely.  
'Would you like to go find some? And we can use your insect book to check out bugs too.'  
'That sounds great.'

* * *

'Shelagh! Timothy! Mrs B has just turned up so lunch will be about half an hour.'  
'Thanks Mum.' Shelagh stood up from her position behind the pigsty. 'I'll uh just go wash up.'  
'Shelagh! You're absolutely filthy! What on earth happened to you?'  
'She fell in the pig slop.' Timothy laughed appearing from behind the blonde. 'I wanted to see Evie and Shelagh wouldn't let me in the pen because I didn't have spare clothes so, she went in to get her out.'  
'A wise decision though you shouldn't be exposing yourself to so many germs whilst your immune system is still weak. Well you go clean...all of yourself. Twice. Timothy do you have a sandwich preference?'  
'I'll eat anything sister. Living with Dad you learn to eat anything vaguely edible.' Timothy grinned as Shelagh giggled.  
'You just happen to choose fish and chips a lot.'  
'Mr Palmer does great chips! You've had them remember.'  
'I didn't say they weren't delicious. But I'm still going to sit your father down and hit him with a cookbook.'  
'Learning by osmosis.' Sister Julienne chuckled.  
'Something like that. Ugh..I have mud in my ear. I'm not used to having my ears at dirt risk.'  
'Go shower!'  
'Yes mum.' Shelagh scampered inside. Timothy grinned at sister Julienne.  
'Shelagh's quite different from sister Bernadette isn't she. In a good way though. She's happier. Not that I didn't like sister Bernadette.'  
'Don't worry I know what you mean. And I agree. This was truly God's will.'g  
'So you're not angry at her for leaving being a nun for dad?'  
'How can I be angry when she is so happy? She has struggled with aspects of the religious life for a while now on top of falling for your father. She was so miserable by the time she was diagnosed with the TB. And she isn't. And I'm thrilled.'  
'it's gross to think dad makes her that happy.'  
'I'm sure it is.' She chuckled. 'Do you want to stay out here or come inside? You can continue reading or talk to one of us if you'd like.'  
'I'll come in. Look what Shelagh bought me.' Tim grinned holding up his new book.  
'Ah butterflies. Shelagh's always loved them.'  
'Me too.'

* * *

'Ah you're clean again. You smell better now too.' Sister Julienne smiled as Shelagh walked in.  
'Thanks mum. I love you too. Tim what are you doing over there?' Shelagh smirked as she walked over to the dining table where Timothy was sat at one end, head buried in an ancient, battered atlas Sister Monica Joan was particularly fond of. Once, several years ago, Sister Julienne had tried to remove it from the premises stating that it was too out of date, and too threadbare to be of any real use. Nobody there that day would ever forget the ensuing tirade that had flowed from the elderly nun. Sister Margaret, a postulate very new to the Order had burst into tears and left that night. Last they had heard she had moved to France to spend time with her ailing mother. Secretly Shelagh found the idea of being scared of Sister Monica Joan endearing though she would never admit that out loud. The atlas had promptly been returned, though now with a more modern brother beside it. That had disappeared 2 months later to nobody's surprise.  
'I found an atlas and I'm trying to find where you grew up.'  
'Any luck?' She asked beginning to set the table.  
'Well Aberdeen is very urban so I am going to hazard a guess that you didn't live in the middle of it. I'd imagine setting up a successful farm there would cause issues with the neighbours.'  
'Aye. I just say Aberdeen because it's close enough. Do you see the royal Aberdeen golf club?'  
'Uhh yes. Next to the river Clyde and next to the sea?'  
'Above the area marked as the golf course do you see a large expanse of land?'  
'Yep.'  
'And Corby Loch?'  
'Uh yes.'  
'That's the farm.'  
'All of the land?'  
'Now yes. When I lived there it was half ours.'  
'Why did it change?'  
'After my dad died the owners of the next farm over bought ours. Technically it was left to Mori and me but we wouldn't have known what to do with it. The MacDonalds were very dear friends of ours. After that we moved to Edinburgh to live with our uncle Andrew.'  
'Edin-bruh...edin-borough. I can't find it.'  
'There it is.'  
'That's how Edinburgh is spelt? Edinberg?'  
'Sweetheart if Edinburgh shocks you please do not ever ask for directions in Scotland.'  
'I'll just drag you along as my official interpretor.'  
'I'd like to see you try.'  
'You're hardly tall. And you're very slim. Give me a year or two and I could probably carry you there.'  
'Your father might object.'  
'I'll get him to carry you then.'  
'Or we could always, oh I don't know, get the train there.'  
'Boring.'

* * *

**Reviews appreciated xx**


	13. Chapter 13

'Welcome home!' They cheered quietly as Chummy walked through the door with Freddie in her arms, Peter trailing behind laddened with the baby paraphernalia. Before them was a table heaving with baby presents, many gifts from the local community she suspected, and a large cake sitting pride of place in the middle of them.  
'Gosh what a lovely welcome. Don't you think so young sir' She grinned as they all crowded around her, eager to see their nephew once more.  
'Oh chummy he's even more beautiful than he was 2 days ago.'  
'He's a Bonnie wee boy that's for sure.'  
'Less of the wee. He already weighs a ton.' Peter grinned proudly down at his boy.  
'Oh you're so lucky.'  
'This was more than luck. The big man upstairs deserves his due.'  
'Indeed so.'  
'Come sit.'  
'Thank you. Oh hello there Timothy.' Chummy smiled as they walked through into the living room  
'Hello Akela. Is that your baby?' He asked, awkwardly perched on the edge of the far sofa, absently flicking through his new butterfly book.  
'Yes. This is Freddie Noakes.' Chummy smiled gesturing for him to come take a closer look. 'What do you think?'  
'He's kinda cute. But he's tiny!' He gawked at the tiny fingers wrapping around his larger one.  
'So were you when you were born young man. Even smaller in fact. I should know I delivered you.' Sister Evangelina said fondly. 'Made a heck of a racket though. You were very eager to let the whole street know you were alive and kicking.'  
'Well that's kind of embarrassing.' Tim flushed as the others laughed.  
'Never mind that Tim. How're you feeling Chummy?'  
'Tired. Sore. Happy. Excited. Terrified. Grateful. Thank you so much for letting us continue to stay here even though we have young sir. We'll be out of your hair as soon as we can.' Chummy promised to Sister Julienne.  
'There's no rush,it should certainly be interesting having a baby staying here.'  
'And you need to recover. Where better than surrounded by nurses who love you?' Trixie beamed.  
'And if you ever need a rest or are bored whilst he's asleep I'm confined to quarters as well. I'd be happy to help out and keep you company. We can gossip about Trixie behind her back.' Shelagh chuckled at the blondes shocked expression and protestation.  
'That sounds nice.' Chummy smiled.  
'Sneaky ploy to get favourite aunt status there Shelagh. Find a way to spend copious amounts of time with him.' Jenny grinned  
'Can you blame me? The bairn is adorable!'  
'We think so.'  
'Shelagh,' Timothy leant into Shelagh to whisper in her ear 'can I have a drink? Then can I go back into the garden? I mean Freddie is kind of cute and all but-'  
'-not really your scene? That's fine. I'll come help you with your drink but after that I'll probably stay in here for a bit longer talking to Akela if you don't mind.'  
'Thanks. I'll see how much stuff I can find from the book you bought me.'  
'Good luck. Come on. Excuse us a moment.' Shelagh rose silently and left the room with Timothy following her.  
'Shelagh?'  
'Yes dear?'  
'Is Akela still going to be Akela now that she's got a baby?'  
'I should imagine so. Once Chummy sets her mind to something she sees it through. It'll be a while before she's fully recovered but once she is she'll probably just bring him with her. He'll be the best prepared boy in emergencies by the time he's 5.' She joked.  
'Good. Bagheera is great at some parts cubs but he isn't as good as Akela at the putting on of plays. He cast me as a girl! Jack teased me for weeks about that.'  
'He only because he knows that you are such a great actor that you can handle the challenge. But next time I see Jack I'll rough him up a bit for you okay?' She promised as he laughed.  
'I think Mrs Smith might complain. Thanks for the offer though.'  
'Ah it's no good then. What drink would you like?'

* * *

'How's it been with Sist- with Shelagh? One imagines it must jolly strange for her hanging around here as a civilian as it were. Do you think she's okay?'  
'She seems to be handling it very well considering. I think she's still riding on the adrenaline of it all. Especially after last night.'  
'You nurses have certainly taken it as an excuse to go around like you're on valium.' Sister Evangelina said not unkindly.  
'Shelagh's really fun. Evidently she's been biting her tongue all the time we've known her.'  
'What happened last night?' Peter asked, eager to cement his place in this female dominated situation.  
'She had her first date with Dr Casanova.' Trixie grinned.  
'Gosh. I assume it went well if Timothy's here.'  
'It went extremely well judging by the post date interrogation we gave her.'  
'I hope you made it sufficiently brutal as it was with me?'  
'Of course. She can give as good as she gets though. She refused to tell us anything until she was tucked up in bed although that may have just been to annoy Trixie who threw a minor tantrum.'  
'I did not! But she's very happy. And as for Timothy it was spend the day with a woman he loves or clean test tubes at the surgery. Hardly a difficult decision.'  
'He adores her.'  
'She adores him too. When we took her shopping I was trying to drag her to buy some shoes when she dashed across the road because a book had caught her attention. It was a book about butterflies! And when I visited her at the Sanatorium he gave me something to give to her that turned out to be a dead butterfly. She was delighted! She's a strange one our Shelagh.'  
'Thanks I love you too Trixie.' Shelagh grinned from the doorway.  
'Oops. Sorry Shelagh.'  
'Not a problem. I've been called worse in my time trust me. Tim has gone back to the garden on a bug hunt. Squeeing over babies isn't really his scene.'  
'Squeeing?'  
'You know...making high pitched noises of excitement. Basically the same as squealing. Anyhow, it's been far too long since I had a cuddle with Freddie.'

* * *

'Shelagh what time is Dad picking me up?' Timothy asked looking up from his book.  
'Not bored of me already are you?'  
'Oh absolutely.' He grinned.  
'He'll pick you up when he's finished at work. He still needs to catch up on his paperwork from your grand adventure into the countryside.'  
'I prefer to think of it as a rescue mission.'  
'Alas I was just a fair damsel in distress wandering around the countryside alone and without a plan before my 2 knights in shining armour came and saved me.' She faux-swooned into the sofa.  
'I think that deserves a reward don't you? A reward in the chocolate department perhaps?'  
'Nice try boy I already gave you cake.' She sat up and levelled him with a _nice try_ arch of her eyebrow.  
'Yes but everyone gets cake if they come here. I'm a special case.'  
'You are special to me but I also got you that book.'  
'Oh yeah. That was pretty neat.' He conceded grinning  
'I'm glad you approve.'  
'Where's everyone else gone?  
'Deliveries, afternoon rounds,sleeping, looking after Freddie etc.'  
'Oh. Do you think Akela minds that you've spent time with me and not her today? '  
'No. She's had everyone else fawning over her. She's probably barely even noticed, especially as she's gotten used to not having me around. Besides she likes you a lot and wouldn't want you to get bored.'  
'Good.'  
'Tell you what I was thinking. Your father is very good at chess right?'  
'Yes.'  
'Well I happen to be rather good at it, we play quite often here and I was wondering if you'd like some help so we can make it a fairer game against him.'

'Wicked.'

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**Sorry for the delay in updates. I've been on holiday. Gave me time to write more of this though :)**

**Reviews much appreciated **

**xx**


	14. Chapter 14

'Well hello again Doctor.' Trixie said opening the door many hours later. Dinner had come and gone and they had all retired to the lounge where a fierce game of chess had been restarted. 'Long time no see.'  
'Trixie stop grinning at him like that, he'll think you're demented.'  
'I've come to collect the boy who is legally and biologically tethered to my bank account.'  
'Right this way.' They walked through and Patrick was pleasantly surprised to see Shelagh and Timothy playfully glaring at each other on the floor.  
'Well well well, what do we have here?'  
'Hi dad. Shelagh's teaching me how to beat you at chess. She's really good. Too good.' He grimaced.  
'Oh is she now? Surely as my uh..._girlfriend_? you should be helping me.' He faltered over the term that didn't quite seem right to describe the woman he loved.  
'Ah yes but as your _girlfriend_, which is a ridiculous term as I am no longer a girl, I am 31 years old, or merely your friend, surely it is a good idea to win over your progeny.'  
'The progeny was already sufficiently enamoured with you.' Patrick rolled his eyes as sat on the floor next to her. Grinning Shelagh leant into his embrace as he wrapped an arm around her waist to take her hand in his.  
'Sufficiently enamoured is not enough my love. I want the progeny to love me more than you.'  
'You're stealing my progeny?' He mock gasped.  
'The progeny is very stealable. I think I could get some good money for him on the black market.' She said sagely.  
'Will you please stop referring to me as _the progeny_?' Tim complained.  
'Hmm I don't know. What do you think darling?'  
'Whatever the progeny wants the progeny gets whilst I'm making a play for favourite adult.'  
'Shelagh!'  
'Sorry you just look so progenous.' She shrugged.  
'Is that even a word?'  
'Not a clue. Look it up when you get home and report back on Friday.'  
'You three are adorable!' Chummy cried delighted as the picture before her.  
'Ew. I don't want to be adorable!' Tim screwed his nose in disgust.  
'Too late son.' Patrick grinned as Shelagh laughed.  
'So so adorable.' She pinched his cheeks playfully.  
'Geroff me!' Tim frowned.  
'Tim!' Patrick warned.  
'Oh it's fine Patrick.'  
'You're just lucky I like you.' Tim smiled.  
'Only like? I've been downgraded! And after I taught you how to beat your father at chess too!'  
'If it's any consolation I love you.' Patrick murmured in her ear before dropping a kiss into her hair. 'I'll say hello to you properly when sister Evangelina isn't glaring at me so much.' He laughed as Shelagh locked eyes with the rotund nun and glared right back before giggling as the nuns disapproving glare softened to a mildly embarrassed _what do you expect this is weird for me_ smile and shrug. 'Now come on Tim, time we were heading home. Have you already eaten? Sorry it took longer doing paperwork than I thought.'  
'Yes I have and I never want to eat anywhere else again. Shelagh's threatening to beat you with a cook book unless you improve soon by the way.'  
'Is that so? I think I do alright.' He cocked an eyebrow at her.  
'Fish and chips from Mr Palmer twice a week, whilst very delicious,does not constitute culinary prowess.' She equalled his challenging gaze.  
'I never claimed to have prowess only acceptability. And I feel that son of mine has been telling porkies about his diet.'  
'Did we or did we not have fish and chips twice this week?'  
'An exception to the rule. I can cook!'  
'That's not what you implied at Christmas.'  
'I can cook!' Patrick defended himself.  
'I'll believe it when I see it!'  
'Alright then. You're coming over for dinner tomorrow right?'  
'Yes.'  
'Well it will have to be simple because I've got a busy day at work but I will cook for you. Unless I'm very busy in which case I'll get Mrs Taylor to make something and I'll cook for you Friday. And it will be _fully_ edible!'  
'You're on! But if it isn't you can take the 3 of us out for dinner wherever I want at the weekend.'  
'Yesterday you claimed you knew nothing about local dining establishments.'  
'I have my ways.' She shrugged grinning wickedly at him  
'I'm slightly terrified by that comment but okay. If I cook something inedible then I'll take you 2 out where ever you want. But if it is edible then...I will think up a forfeit.'  
'Shake on it?'  
'Pinky swear.'  
'What are you 8 years old?' He laughed  
'I trust nothing but pinky swears.'  
'Compromise. Pinky swear and a kiss.'  
'You drive a good deal. I shall accept .' She grinned as she linked pinky fingers with him.  
'Tim look away.' She laughed but accepted his kiss with pleasure but cut it shorter than either really wanted. Such overt displayed of affection in front of the nuns was uncomfortable for her. It had technically only been 3 days since she had been a nun. She opened her eyes and pulled back sloghtly to find him grinning at her, still only inches from her face. He looked so appealing at that moment that she gave in to the urge to kiss his lips briefly once more.  
'Are you two finished being gross? Argh! No you're not! That is disgusting! There are impressionable young minds here! I would like to keep my dinner down please. Thank goodness Freddie is being spared this horrible picture. He's too young for such horror.'  
'Alright alright let's get you home young man. You can continue playing chess with Shelagh when she comes over for dinner on Friday.'  
'Can't I see her tomorrow?'  
'You're going to granny Parkers tomorrow remember. You're staying the night.'  
'Oh yeah. Bye Shelagh! He flung himself at her and sent her onto her back laughing.  
'Bye Tim. I'll see you Friday.'  
'Bye love.' Patrick picked up her hand and kissed the back of it.  
'Bye Patrick. Ha, would you like some help getting up old man?' She stood and pulled him up.  
'Thanks love. You are far too cheeky for your own good missy.'  
'And yet you love me so it can't be all bad.'  
'I must be mad courting you.'  
'It's a very real possibility. I mean who goes around falling in love with a nun for goodness sake? You must be some kind of freak.'  
'And on that scathing attack on me I shall depart.'  
'Night freak.'  
'Night freaks girlfriend.'  
Yes yes you're both disgustingly in love with each other. Can we go now? If we leave now I might just make it in time for The Lone Ranger?'  
'Night Progeny.' Shelagh laughed as the Turners departed. Beaming a smile overflowing with happiness Shelagh settled back on the floor to pack up the chess board.  
'I must admit when you first told me you were romantically entangled with Doctor Turner I could not imagine it. I was thrilled for you of course but now I cannot imagine anything more right.' Chummy revealed as Shelagh blushed. 'I hope Peter and I will as good with Freddie as the two of you are with Timothy.'  
'Oh wow. Really? I mean I'm only his dad's girlfriend for lack of a better word and I've only been seeing Patrick a few days.'  
'But you've been acting maternal towards him for a while now. I remember an incident when he turned up at clinic after injuring himself at school and you took care of him.' Cynthia interjected.  
'And you ran the 3 legged race with him after his father had to drop out and helped him win. And the same day I saw you giving him a last minute pep talk before the cub performance. And you helped him fix his costume.'  
'And there was that delightful picture he drew of the two of you.' Sister Julienne smiled as Shelagh grinned at the memory.  
'And he sent you that dead butterfly. Nobody can be _that_ happy to receive a dead insect.' That was Trixie  
'And you wrote that note to him. He was so excited to tell me he'd heard from you.' Jenny smiled. She had always been fond of young Timothy Turner and the joy on his face at correspondence from the woman she loved dearly brought joy to her.  
'And when he was upset about his mother earlier this year you talked to him like his father couldn't.'  
'You're very special to him. You're basically his mum any way.'  
'You think?'  
'Did you even listen to a word they just said? He adores you and it's plain to see you adore him too.' Sister Evangelina huffed not unkindly.  
'I do. He's a wonderful boy. A credit to his parents.'  
'Of which you are becoming one.'  
'We've only been on one date. I think it's a tad soon to be calling me his parent.' She frowned. Sensing her growing discomfort sister Julienne changed the subject.  
'Isn't it great. We're all together again.'  
'It took us a while to get there but we finally have chummy, Jane and Shelagh under the same roof at the same time.'  
'And I'm very glad of it.' Chummy smiled as the phone rang.  
'Who's first on call?'  
'That'd be me.' Cynthia rushed out.  
'So what's this I hear about you finally giving in to Jimmy's friend Jenny?' Chummy grinned.  
'He's not so terrible I guess. And Shelagh-you never said how you even knew about it.' Jenny frowned.  
'Yes I did. The walls have ears.'  
'That's not an answer.'  
'Well it's the only one you're getting from me. Complete honesty hour was last night. It's over now.'  
'I'll get it out of you eventually Shelagh Mannion.'  
'I'd like to see you try. Between Morag, sister Evangelina and Jamie I've been subjected all interrogation techniques, all nonillegal torture methods, all scare tactics. I'm immune now. You've just been lucky these past few days that I've told you so much.'  
'Who are Morag and Jamie?'  
'Jamie was one of my best friends growing up and Morag is my almost identical twin sister.'  
'Why was I on a list of torturers?'  
'You have to admit we hardly had a harmonious start to our relationship.' Shelagh chuckled.  
'That reminds me, you promised to tell me about the time sister Evangelina tried to wake you up and the two of you ended up locked in a room together.'  
'Ah yes. Sister do you mind if I tell this story?'  
'Go ahead. That was certainly an interesting day.'  
'Quite. I have always, as I mentioned to you yesterday Trixie, had a problem with early morning wake ups. This event happened about 5 months into my postulancy when I was even worse at waking up than I am now. I was also completely, utterly, ridiculously terrified of sister Evangelina. I was in the middle of a dream in which sister Evangelina was shouting at me about something and physically attacking me, I forget what I'd done wrong, and suddenly I'm being shaken awake by the real sister Evangelina who is very loudly telling me to get up. So, in a moment of self defense and protestation about being awoken I kicked her right in the stomach and punched her in the face.'  
'Surprisingly strong little blighter you are. Completely winded me and i had a black eye for weeks.' The nun in question chuckled.  
'Tell me about it. Freakishly strong little Scot.'  
'I still claim that was in your best interests Trixie. But there we are, Sister Evangelina is rolling in the floor clutching her gut attempting to shout at me, I'm now wide awake and whimpering because I thought she was about to kill me. One of the other postulants Sister Catherine runs in and shouts that I've killed Sister Evangelina. Sister Marie Claire, the head nun at the time, comes running in because she heard me scream and Sister Evangelina fall. I'm now hyperventilating and Sister Evangelina looks like she's about to strangle me with the bedlinen so Sister Marie Claire berates us and sends us on our way. 3 days pass and Sister Evangelina is storming around like a woman possessed, I'm ridiculously jittery, shrieking at the slighest sound and avoiding sister Evangelina like the plague. Everyone is sick to death of it so sister Marie Claire grabs both of us by the ear and drags us down to the boiler room and locks us both in there until we 'start to act like adults and get on with each other'. At first I tried hiding behind anything and everything I could find before hiding in a corner with Sister Evangelina in the other. I of course apologise but Sister Evangelina just glares at me and I almost wet myself. Every half hour Sister Marie Claire comes to check on us until about 5 hours in when Mum manages to smuggle an almond sponge in for me. Neither of us had eaten anything since the night before so I offered Sister Evangelina a slice. Imagine Sister Marie-Claire's surprise when she checks on us 40 minutes later when we're playing rummy,eating cake and suddenly acting like old friends.'  
'The route to my heart is cake. I've never pretended otherwise.' Sister Evangelina laughed as Shelagh grinned at her.  
'We've had a few conflicts since but after that cake nothing as bad as before.'  
'I should have given you two cake months before.'  
'Wait...you're _'mum'_?' Chummy interjected.  
'She is. '  
'I am.'  
'Oh how lovely.' Chummy beamed.  
'Shelagh were you really _that_ terrified of me?' Sister Evangelina frowned.  
'Oh absolutely petrified. One of the reasons mum and I got so close so quickly was because she would let me come to her after the two of us fought and cry into her habit for a few hours.'  
'hours?!'  
'You once shouted at me because I had my wimple on skewiff and I cried for about 4 hours in her bed. I was a very wet postulant.'  
'You _did_ do a lot of crying. And we had to throw you in the shower to wake up once or twice early on but it was mainly the crying. Why do you think I stopped talking to you for 4 months Sister Evangelina?'  
'I _did_ wonder. I'm sorry Shelagh.'  
'No problem. I got over it years ago and I'm a much stronger person for it. And as far as I know _you've_ never terrified someone so much they not only left the Order but left the country.' Shelagh grinned as Sister Monica Joan who winked back. Sisters Julienne and Evangelina simply winced at the memory  
'No way.' Jenny gaped.  
'Way.' Shelagh grinned and launched into another tale.

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**Reviews greatly appreciated xx**

**Next chapter: some Shelagh and Chummy bonding**


	15. Chapter 15

'Knock knock.'  
'Come in. Oh hello Shelagh.' Chummy grinned as her friend slipped through the door.  
'Fancy some company on this fine morning?'  
'I'd love some.' Chummy smiled gratefully patting the space next to her on the bed. Briefly Shelagh wondered when and where that had acquired a double bed. 'Sister Evangelina comes by every now and again to make sure I'm resting and not being too energetic. Truth be I don't think I _could_ be energetic right now.' She smiled wryly.  
'Are you alright?'  
'Just tired. Young sir didn't want to sleep last night. I do hope we didn't keep up.'  
'I slept like a baby last night. Or not in this case. And I haven't heard any complaints from sister Evangelina so you're fine.'  
'Just wait. The complaints will come I'm sure.'  
'How could anyone complain about you little man. You're gorgeous. Aren't you wee one.' Shelagh cooed at the tot.  
'Would you like to hold him.' Chummy offered up her son who looked at the new face with intrigue.  
'Yes please. How's motherhood so far?'  
'Best experience I've ever had. The idea of a tiny human depending completely on you. It's terrifying but really rather marvellous. Do you-gosh I can't believe I'm asking _you_ this but-do you think you'll have children now that you've left the Order?'  
'I hope so. I think I'd quite like to be a mother someday, not just a stepmother. Timothy is wonderful and I love him dearly already but I've missed out so much with him.' Shelagh sighed before beaming as Freddie reached up towards her. Gently he kissed his little fist.  
'Would you still want children if Dr Turner wasn't the father?'  
'I don't know. When I was a girl I desperately wanted children, wanted to be as good a parent as mine were. But when I joined the order I gave up the hope, pushed it to the back of my mind until I had forgotten it. And that was fine. I was happy with my life. But then Timothy happened. I came to care very deeply for him and saw how he was with his father, how he was growing into a miniature version of Patrick and I came to wonder what it would be like to have a mini me, someone who you made with the person you love, someone who was a mix of the two of you, someone you could pass your habits and idiosyncrasies onto, someone who would look up to you for so much. And then, later, I fell in love with Patrick and I began dreaming of little girls with his hair and my eyes, or my nose and his height, or little boys with my hair and his mouth. Of course I felt horrifically guilty for having such dreams whilst I was a nun. Then again a lot of the dreams I had were bad for a nun.' She smiled ruefully. 'Nuns should not spend that amount of time dreaming of a man's mouth.' They giggled 'I was a very naughty little nun young man.' She cooed at Freddie 'One day you'll find out the truth and be utterly ashamed of your Auntie Shelagh but I'll have already charmed you so much you love me unconditionally so you'll forgive me.'  
'That reminds me, I saw yesterday that your name is not spelt the way I thought it was. Is that the Scottish spelling?'  
'Yes. Scottish and Irish. Drove the lecturers at the London crazy.'  
'It's a very pretty name.'  
'Thank you. My parents named me after my maternal grandmother. She was half Irish and fiercely proud of it even though she lived her entire life in Scotland.'  
'I don't remember either of my grandmothers. Pa's died when I was 2 and Maters before I was born. I'm glad Peter's parents will be there for Freddie. Not to mention all the surrogates here.'  
'Have you not heard from your own parents?' Shelagh frowned.  
'Not really. Mater has barely spoken to me since I announced I was pregnant. Pa sent a card but I suspect Mater has banned him from anything more.' Chummy frowned.

'I'm sorry.'  
'I have Peter and Freddie. I am more than happy with them.' Chummy put on a fake smile and cheery tone of voice but Shelagh was not fooled and she knew it.  
'Still, it would be nice surely to at least speak to them.'  
'Ideally. What about your parents? You said you wanted to be as good a parent as them? You're close then? How did they take the news? Or is your mother no longer with us on this earth if sister Julienne is your mother?'  
'Sister Julienne would be my mother regardless due to her actions over the past decade. But you are correct. My mother died when I was 7, my father when I was 16. I miss both of them every single day particularly Da. Forgive me but I cannot imagine having both parents alive and not being close to them. There is nothing I wouldn't do to see them again.' Shelagh admitted as tears began to form in her eyes, freeing up an hand she hastily wiped away the few that dared roll down her cheek.  
'Heavens I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry.' Chummy panicked grabbing the free hand and squeezing it reassuringly.  
'It's okay. I think the emotion of the last few days is catching up with me that's all.' Shelagh sighed.  
'You were lucky. You had incredible parents by the sounds of it, even if your time with them was limited. That's the kind of parent I want to be. Freddie will never doubt how much his daddy and I love him.'  
'Not to mention how much his auntie Shelagh loves him. And the rest of his aunts. No matter what your parents decide, Freddie will have a family.'  
'This is his family. Mater and Pa will be lucky to have him in their lives but he doesn't _need_ them.'  
'Knock knock, is everyone alright in here?' Sister Evangelina strode in without invitation. The nurses smirked at each other at the characteristically in your face attitude of the beloved nun.  
'Tickety Boo and marvellous.' Shelagh grinned.  
'Oh hello Shelagh. What are you doing in here?'  
'Holding a convalescers United meeting and exceeding my minimum daily limit of Freddie snuggling.' Shelagh laughed.  
'He's going to be the most cuddled child in all of history.' Sister Evangelina chuckled.  
'Fancy helping out on that front?' Chummy laughed as Shelagh held out the baby for the nun who eagerly took him.  
'I suppose I could lend a few minutes to the cause. Hello again young man. Where are you going Shelagh?'  
'Cake scavenge. Any requests?'

* * *

'Chummy I have an unusual request for you.' Shelagh said tentatively as Sister Evangelina strode back out of the room after unwillingly relinquishing the baby back to his mother in the name of Mrs Johnson down Bermondsely Lane who had gone into labour 2 weeks early.  
'Go on.'  
'This is going to sound strange but would you mind if I drew Freddie? He's so drawable and he changes every hour seemingly. I know there'll be lots of photos taken of him but I always find drawing captures more of the personality of a subject than a photo. You can keep it of course, I just have so much time on my hands and I do so love to draw. I got back into the habit, no pun intended, whilst I was at the sanatorium.' Shelagh explained quietly aware that the request would not be accepted by all parents.  
'Gosh I'd be honoured. Do you think he will be able to stay still long enough for you to manage?'  
'There's one way to find out. Thank you'  
'Shelagh I'm very glad you're okay. It was horrible coming home and finding out you were so ill yet bring unable to visit you.' Chummy frowned as the memories came pouring back. She was not ashamed to admit that she had cried many times the night she had returned.  
'It wasn't very fun for me either getting a phone call saying you were in hospital and were gravely ill. At least I was getting better when you came home. Though you got a better end result.'  
'You got Dr Turner and Timothy.'  
'Provisionally. You have Freddie for life.' Shelagh smiled at the now snoozing baby.  
'You can't possibly imagine that you won't marry him.'Chummy said aghast. 'I have never seen two better who fit together better.'

'I think and hope that I will but I don't want to get my hopes up. It's why I got so uncomfortable yesterday when you were all calling me Tim's mum. If I allow myself to truly believe I will definitely marry Patrick and be a mother to Tim and others but then it fell through I don't know what I would do. The entire house seems deeply invested in this working out. I've given up so much for it that it not happening could destroy me.'  
'It's only been a few days.' Chummy realised. 'It's all going rather fast for you isn't it'  
'Exactly. Patrick and I barely know each other really. I love him more than anything but what if it's not enough?'  
'Shelagh I wish I could look into some crystal ball and tell you everything will be alright. I can only tell you not to let your fears stop you from enjoying this precious time with Patrick. I nearly lost Peter because of my fears of my mother and I deeply regret it. Besides, whatever happens between the two of you you'll always have Nonnatus. We all love you and will always be here for you. You're bally fun I'm informed.'

'Thank you Chummy. It's nice to talk to someone who knows what it's like. The others are still caught up in the frivolities of romance. I seem to have landed halfway through a romance in some ways.'

'Yes rather.'

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**I know this is getting caught up in domestics, f it's too much just say. The plot will move on more soon and Morag will make an appearance soon.**

**Reviews appreciated xx**


	16. Chapter 16

'How's your day been? Sick of your four walls yet?' Patrick asked as they settled down to their dinner.  
'It's been good thank you. I spent most of it with Chummy and baby Freddie. I've begun drawing him. I know I said I'd draw something but babies change so fast...'  
'Don't worry about it love. I can wait. But don't feel under any pressure. How are Nurse Noakes and little Noakes doing?'  
'Tired but on cloud nine as you'd imagine. Freddie's fine. Absolutely gorgeous though You'd never imagine the drama that surrounded his entry to this world looking at him. I've missed her. Between Africa and the Sanatorium it was 8 months between her leaving and me visiting her in the hospital.' Shelagh said sadly.  
'True. That's almost as long as you knew her before.'  
'Yes it is. Funny how quickly someone becomes indispensable in your life.'  
'Or how quickly the nun you've known a decade becomes everything to you.' He grinned.  
'Quite. Oh Chummy says what ho by the way.' She grinned as she recalled her friends passing shout as she had run out of the front door.  
'I'll have to visit her again some time.' He mused. 'Professional interest of course. It has been several days since I saw them both in the hospital.' He grinned.  
'Oh of course. I'm sure she'd be thrilled to introduce you to Freddie.' Briefly Shelagh wondered what Patrick would look like with a baby in his arms for more than the time it took to pass it to it's mother or check it over for illness. She had seen him with babies so many times and yet now it meant so much more to her. What would he look like with their baby in his arms. She imagined waking up in their bed, turning over to see her husband sitting beside her feeding their baby son or daughter a bottle before passing the bairn over to their mother.  
'Shelagh? Going somewhere nice?' Patrick interrupted her musings. She started as she realised how deeply she'd absorbed herself in her daydream.  
'Delightful thank you. A may tell you about it sometime if you're lucky.' She grinned. 'You know Chummy really is extremely fond of you you know. She told me if Nonnatus had to lose Sister Bernadette to anyone it would be to you. She's very happy for us both.'  
'As am I my love. Absolutely thrilled.'

* * *

'So? It's confession time Patrick! Did you cook that rather delightful meal or did you get your housekeeper to cook for you?' Shelagh asked as they curled up on the sofa, his arm resting gently across her shoulder as she leant into his side.  
'Housekeeper. But only because I overran at the surgery.' He defended himself hastily as she laughed.  
'I believe you. For now. But this means you've only got Friday to prove Tim and I wrong about your cooking abilities. You still haven't told me what the forfeit for you cooking edible food is. I have already decided where I wish to go when you inevitably burn it. Very expensive restaurant of course.' She teased. In reality she would be more than happy to go to a local cafe so long as she got to be with her Turner boys.  
'Can't I just kiss you to the point of forgetting that deal?' He groaned cupping her cheek so he could turn her face to meet his. Slowly, agonizingly he drew her face closer until they were only a hairs breadth apart before he stopped. 'Well,' she mused 'it's certainly worth a try.' She closed the gap.  
'Did Timothy make it to his grandmother's alright?' Shelagh asked.  
'My darling I do not want to think about my son or my mother in law whilst I'm making a careful oral examination of your neck and collar.' He groaned, barely audibly from her clavicle.  
'Sorry. Carry on Doctor.'

* * *

'To answer your earlier, ill-timed question Tim got to Granny Parkers fine.' Patrick answered once they had resumed their curled up embrace. Shelagh had started to panic at how much she was enjoying having such affection lavished on her neck and had ended it with an apologetic kiss. He had understood. He would never have taken such a liberty after only 5 days of dating with a normal woman, let alone a woman who had been a nun less than a week previously,. There was just something about Shelagh that made him forget the propitiousness of the early days of dating and his restraint. Unfortunately Shelagh felt the same about Patrick. Both knew they wanted to spend the rest of theirs lives showing their devotion to each other so it seemed ridiculous that they couldn't from the off.  
'Good. Did you drive him or did he get the train? Where does she live?'  
'I drove him there. She only lives about 20 miles west.'  
'Ah. Does she know about .. this? About us?'  
'Yes. Whilst Tim was saying hello to all the animals I explained this all to her. She's happy for me, for us, all three of us. She'd like to meet you sometime. Not right now.' He added seeing her panicked expression. 'I understand that meeting the mother of your boyfriends late wife after less than 5 days of dating is a daunting prospect. Neither of you are ready for that just yet.' He chuckled.  
'Thank you for understanding. I'd like to meet her too someday. She means a lot to the two of you.' She kissed his shoulder,  
'Thank you. As I was leaving I heard her ask Tim about you. Shelagh he thinks the world of you. Even I never realised quite how much you mean to him.'  
'I know. He's extremely wonderful. I should be heading back. We're pushing the boundaries of acceptable behaviour just by being alone in your house and it's starting to get quite dark. Don't want to give the gossips any more fodder.' She said sadly 'As you wish. Would you like me to drive you home or shall we walk?'  
'Let's walk. It's a mild night and I'm not willing for this evening to end quite yet.'

* * *

'Thank you for a lovely evening Patrick.' Shelagh grinned as they reached the top of the steps to Nonnatus House 'You're welcome my love. I love Timothy but it's nice to not have to fight for your attention in my own home.' He chuckled.  
'I know what you mean. He's a darling but very loud.'  
'And very eager to please you. Goodnight sweetheart.'  
'Should I start singing?' She giggled.  
'As much I would love to hear your voice-I hear it comes highly recommended-there are eyes watching us again.'  
'Nosy so-and-sos. I'm sorry do they make you uncomfortable? I can tell them to stop. The respect you greatly so if you want they'll stop.'  
'It's fine. They'll get used to us I'm fairly certain one of the pairs belongs to Sister Evangelina.'  
'I can take her.'  
'I have no doubt of that my love.'  
'Shall we give her something to complain about? You know how she loves to complain.'  
'You're all heart darling. But go on then.' He pulled her closer to him and kissed her passionately. She responded eagerly, creeping up onto her tiptoes so she could wrap her arms around his neck more thoroughly.  
'That's enough of that thank you.' Sister Evangelina swung open the door and pulled a cackling Shelagh through.  
'Night handsome. I love you.'  
'Night gorgeous. I love you too.'

* * *

'So?'

'Housekeeper.' Shelagh shrugged.

* * *

**Next Chapter-Morag.**

**Reviews appreciated xxxx**


	17. Chapter 17

**Sorry for the delay in update for this. Other fanfictions took hold of me and kidnapped me briefly. I'm posting in a brief escape but I have no doubt they will catch up with me at some point**

**For my MMEPAC girls, Hannah I know I said I'd have this up earlier but I was reading MASH fanfiction and that stuff is _good._**

* * *

'Shelagh, phone for you.' Jenny grinned walking into the living room.

'That Doctor of yours can't go an entire day without speaking to you!' Trixie tittered.

'Actually it's not Doctor Turner. It's Morag.'

'Morag!' Shelagh gasped, a large grin spreading across her face.

'The one and only.'

'Excuse me.' Shelagh dashed out and grabbed the phone. 'Mori?'

'Ellie? Oh gods it's so good to hear your voice.' Morag gasped.

'Oh Mori I miss you so much.' Shelagh sobbed as the voice she had longed to hear for a decade cam down the phone. Suddenly she felt their split even more keenly than ever. The pain was unbearable.

'I miss you too El. So so much. I'm so sorry it's taken so long to phone but I've only just got your letter. I've been on a school trip to France the past week. I've only just got back. Shelagh is it true? Is it really true? You've left the order? You're in love? You're not a nun anymore?' Morag asked shocked. Shelagh smiled, knowing that she was talking to the one person in the whole world who she could be 100% honest with about the whole situation. Morag was an outsider to the Poplar/Religious Order dynamic, but more than that, she was her best friend and the one person she trusted most in the world.

'Yes. I've really left the Order but not just because I've fallen so hopelessly in love with Patrick. I've been feeling...dissatisfied for well over a year now, closer to 18 months really. I wanted things I couldn't have as a nun. I wanted to go to the the dances with the nurses, wear pretty dresses, doll myself up, drink with them in their rooms. I wanted the freedom to do be able to do such basic things. I've spent so long agonising over it all that I can barely a time before it all. Don't get me wrong though I've loved my 10 years as Sister Bernadette. I really, really loved being a nun. I'm going to miss it.'

'Oh El that must have been so horrible for you. I'm so sorry.'

'You don't...you don't hate me do you? For turning my back on the Order?' Shelagh bit her lip to stem the rising panic.

'What? El of course I don't hate you! You are happy aren't you?'

'Ecstatically so.'

'That's all I've ever wanted for you. I understood when you had the calling and left and I understand that you've had another calling from God. I trust you to make the best decisions for yourself under the guidance of God. Now tell me all about Patrick. And I mean everything.'

'Okay.' Shelagh settled in the chair. 'Well his name is Patrick Turner, he's a bit older than us-he refuses to tell me exactly how much-he's the local GP and works very closely with us in deliveries. He's a spectacular Doctor.' She said proudly.

'That would be great if I was hiring him for a job. Tell me about him. Tell me about my soon to be brother in law.'

'He's tall, dark and very handsome. He's kind and gentle but strong fantastic kisser you'll be glad to hear, really just a superb kisser...' Shelagh trailed off as she remembered the feel of his lips over hers. She grinned before shaking hersef out of her daydream. 'He's a great dancer. He has the most attractive arms you will ever see on a man. He has this slightly floppy black hair that I rarely see tamed. He has these gorgeous green eyes. He loves reading just as much as Mum did. He's a fantastic father-'

'He has kids?'

'One. Timothy. He's 10. I almost love him more than Patrick. We've been friends for years now, he lost his mother nearly two years ago and he needed someone to turn to. Patrick was not the best person to talk to. I'm very glad he came to me. He's very smart, too smart for his own good really, he's funny and brave, he's a great artist, he loves butterflies, he's great at chess, I'm teaching him how to beat his father and he's going to overtake me soon at the rate he's improving. But most of all he's really very kind. He understands how strange this past week has been for me and helped me as much as he can.'

'Awww.'

'What?'

'You sound like a Mum right now.' Morag chuckled. Shelagh grinned, feeling proud at the statement.

'In a way I feel I already am. I don't want to get my hopes up in case it doesn't work out for some reason but I really want to be his Mum. I want to be Patrick's wife. I want to be a Turner. I'll always be a Mannion though, don't you worry.'

'Oh of course. I'm happy for you El. I'm not surprised to fell for a widower with a son. You've always had the biggest heart of anyone I know. You'll be fantastic.'

'Thank you. But enough about me, How are you? I take it you're still working as a teacher seeing as you've just come back from a trip? Got yourself a young man yet?'

'Nothing permanent yet. My sister the nun got a laddie before me. Oh the shame.' Morag cried dramatically. Shelagh giggled.

'Oh I've missed this.'

'Me too El, me too. But yes I'm still working at the school in Pontypool. It's alright. Pays the bills. Speaking of which we need to speak to the bank when I visit so you can get access to you inheritance and the bank account. I suppose we should make you your own one now too. I haven't touched your money. I always made sure it was safe just in case. The interest must be amazing by now. Not to mention all the income from our share in the farm. You're rich sis.'

'Do you keep in touch with the farm?'

'Yes I do. I visit occasionally as well. It's doing so well. They're the number one exporter of Aberdeen Angus and are doing extremely well in their pigs as well. They've started doing pony treks around the loch too. It's...really quite tremendous work their doing up there. They're doing us proud El.' Morag boasted as Shelagh sighed in relief. The farm had meant so much to her growing up that she had spent many nights lain awake at night worrying about it.

'You sound like an adult. I don't like it.' She joked.

'I've had to fend for myself. I needed to grow up.'

'I'm sorry. It's my fault you were on your own. I was the only person you had and I left you.' Shelagh said sadly. It was the main regret of her joining the order that Morag would be left with no-one. But she had to follow His instruction. Even if it meant breaking two hearts.

'Oh no I didn't mean that as condemnation. Far from it. As much as I love you I think it was probably for the best that we took sperate paths into adulthood. We could have ended up as those unsettlingly creepy twins you hear of.'

'Remind me to tell you about Meg and Maeve Carter one day.' Shelagh grinned. During the delivery of the twins jr she had been overwhelmed by the memories of how close she was to her own twin and couldn't help but wonder what she would have done if she'd had to listen to Morag in such distress.

'Sounds intriguing. Will do.'

'Now you mentioned your visit...when would that be?'

'I'm sorry, I wish I could say this weekend but I'm shattered after France and I have to prepare for the oncoming next half of term. But next weekend definitely. It's been 10 years, one more week can't be too bad can it?'

'I guess not. I just really want to see and hold you this second.'

'Me too. I want it desperately. But I can probably get down Friday night so that's only 6 days. I'll have to check the trains though, and make sure I can find somewhere to stay and-'

'You're staying here. I won't hear of you staying anywhere else. We have the room and Mum said-'

'Mum?' Morag broke in confused.

'Oh. Yeah. About that. Morag listen when I first joined here I was scared and uncertain and a bit of a mess. Sister Julienne, the nun in charge-you must remember her-took me under wing, made me her protege. We've become extremely close and at some point in the past decade we came to love each other as mother and daughter. Now that I've left the Order I call her Mum. It's not that I don't miss our Mum. Not at all. I love Mum with all of my heart but-'

'It's okay Shelagh. I'm happy for you. I'm glad you have someone like that. Truly I am. I shall have to give her a big hug when I see her. I'll have to thank everyone there for looking after you.'

'Thank you.'

'So tell me about the rest of Nonnatus House. Any more family members there?'

'They are all family to me. You've been replaced many times over. I don't really need you anymore.' Shelagh laughed.

'Excellent. Give me three words on each of them else we'll be here all day. They mean so much to you yet I don't really know them at all. But just to make it interesting you cannot reuse a word.'

'Good to know you're just as weird as ever.'

'I like to be consistent.'

'Three words? Gosh. Uh. Well Mum is ...warm, sensible and commanding. She has the best eyebrow quirk you will ever see. I mean it is phenomenal. Sister Evanglina is..opinionated..loud...stubborn.' Shelagh chuckled. 'She's been like a big sister to me, grumpy fights and all. Then there's Sister Monica Joan she is eccentric, and wise and intelligent. The nurses are Trixie, you'll get on great with her I just know it, she's bubbly, dedicated...romantic, Cynthia is sensitive, kind, passionate-'

'She sounds like you.'

'We're definitely similar. Jenny is honest, reliable, friendly, Chummy is tall-'

'-so not like us-' Shelagh could hear Morag's grin down the phone.

'No. Not in that regard certainly. She's also strong and courageous. Then we have an orderly nurse Jane-Jane is...brave, quiet, inspiring. Our handyman Fred is charming, busy, inivative, our cook, Mrs B, is talented, funny, beautiful. Then there's Chummy's husband Peter, he's a policeman, he's devoted, a great father and nice. I'm running out of new words here. They have a newborn son Freddie who is dribbly, very dribbly, noisy and completely perfect. Then there are our resident pigs Evie and Bernie. Evie is mucky, smelly and adorable. Bernie is proud, loyal and uh rotund?'

'Quite the assortment of characters. I cannot wait to meet all of them.'

'They can't wait to meet you too. I've told them all about you and they're very excited. Honestly I think Trixie just really wants to see how similar we look. I don't have any photos.' Shelagh said sadly though she knew that seeing Morag's face everyday without being able to speak with her in more than brief letters would have been unbearable.

'I'll make sure to bring down all of your possessions I have with me on Friday.' Morag promised.

You kept them?'

'of course I did. Just in case you ever needed them. And as a memento of you.'

'Thank you.'

'Damn it. There's someone at the door.'

'I'd better let you answer it then.' Shelagh said sadly, not wanting to have to hang up.

'Aye.'

'I love you Morag.'

'I love you too Shelagh. Ellie-'

'Yes?'

'They would have been proud of you you know. Mum and Da. They'd have been so damn proud of you.' Tears sprung to her eyes.

'Thank you. They'd be proud of you too. Who would have guessed you would become a teacher. Can I phone you again in the week?'

'If you don't I shall be very disappointed.'

'Good.'

'Bye Ellie. I love you.'

'Bye Mori. I love you too.' Shelagh put down the phone and felt the tears start to pour down her face. She hurried to her room before collapsing onto the bed in floods of tears, sobbing into her pillow. Several minutes later she looked up at a gentle knock on her door. She didn't need her glasses to tell who it was, though they'd have been useless against the tears obscuring her sight. 'Mum?'

'Oh Shelagh.' Sister Julienne sat next to her on the bed and pulled her into her arms. 'My darling girl what is wrong? Did Morag have bad news?'

'No. I just really missed her. And I have to wait another week before I can see her when all I want to do is hug her and never let go. And she misses me too. I left her all alone in the pursuit of the religious life but now that's over and I was so scared that she would hate me for abandoning her for what she might see as nothing. It's not nothing to me though. I'd have never have met you or the others or Patrick and Timothy and that is everything to me and I was scared she wouldn't understand that but she did and she loves me and I miss her so much!' Shelagh cried into her mothers habit.

'Oh my love. Breathe now. Nobody could ever hate you. Especially Morag.'

'I know. I do know that but there's so much going on in my life that I feel like I can barely understand it let alone anyone else. Oh Mori is coming to visit at the weekend, hopefully Friday night. I said she could stay here. That's okay isn't it?'

'That is absolutely fine. I wouldn't let her sleep anywhere else. This is your home and your sister is always welcome.'

'Thank you.'

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**Reviews appreciated xx**


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